Someone Told Me This Would Be Helpful....

There are days....

2011-12-13T21:35:00.003-06:00

When everything feels overwhelming. The slightest chore makes you want to cry and when your toddler insists that you do it, he is too tired pushes you to your limit. But today while it was one of those days, I realized something. For those of you who know me well, you know I can't throw up. It just doesn't work, my body refuses to let nature take its course when I get sick and thus I have created a real issue for myself when we are exposed to the sickness. Which we were recently by one of my sweet sisters boys. I can't tell you how many times I have repeated over and over "come what may, some day I will learn to deal with this sickness" in the last two days. But today I realized something a little bit more profound about myself, my love for my sister and my boy can transcend my fear of the pukes. Leland was the one directly "exposed" from hugs and possible kisses, and yet today when he wanted to be cuddled I fought the inner battle while holding him, realizing I can't not show my little love affection just because he might have been exposed to a sickness my mind makes SO sadly HUGE that I lose the ability to cope, and so when I would cuddle him or rub his back I would remind myself, I will be ok, regardless of what happens, it will be short lived and I will be ok. I realized this again as 3:30 came around and sister texted to ask me to cancel another one of her boy's doctors appointment because she was stuck at her appointment longer than she had anticipated, with her husband unable to help, and knowing that she had been stressed about the said boys situation I sucked it up and went to pick him up, even though she repeatedly told me not to (guess she should take me off the approved list is she doesn't want me to do doctors appointments with her kids ;)) and the whole time instead of feeling panicked I felt a peace, I was serving when it needed to be done, she hadn't dreamed of asking for it, because she knows my silly fears, but I knew she would rest better if I could fulfill this one need for her. And I am glad I did as he needed some medicine for his little lungs. She comes through for me all the time, and willingly serves even if it is the dreaded pukes and so I learned something valuable about myself today. I learned that I am driven more by love than by fear. That is pretty amazing because not too long ago I would have just cancelled that appointment and stayed home praying I wouldn't get sick. Don't get me wrong I am still praying I won't get sick, especially because I have an oral surgery set up for Thursday and my parents are coming the week after that for Christmas.

On a totally unrelated note I wanted to jot this down just so I could remember it. Tonight as I sat with Leland singing to him (I often sing him 3 or 4 songs and rarely I will sing till he is asleep) I was overcome with how much love I feel for my little man. He is amazing people. He is funny and sweet, spicy and thoughtful and he knows just what to say to melt my heart and get what he wants, and man am I so grateful to have him in my life! He is my joy and I love him to bits. I am one lucky mama.

Ugh....

2011-11-15T22:04:00.003-06:00

My Leland goes to school in our school district for speech, it's an awesome program and we are lucky that he has an awesome teacher. His teacher asked me about 2 weeks before Max came if I would be interested in moving him from her class (which is a special ed only class and has about 8 or 9 kids in it) into an inclusion classroom. For those that may not know it speech classifies a child as Special ed, thus the inclusion classroom which is a fancy way of saying there are a few high achieving special ed kids in a class with "normal" functioning kids his age. I am all for this change, however, given the circumstances and all the changes at home I thought I would really like to wait a while and see how Leland handles the change, I expressed that to his teacher and told her I was fine to get the ball rolling (as with everything funded by the government there is a TON of paperwork for these poor teachers!) and we could put it on pause if Leland didn't handle it well, after all too much change makes most adults nervous and most of us have the ability to really understand whats happening, whereas a 4 year old has limited ability to really understand whats happening around him, even when you talk it over with them a million times their little mind just can't wrap around what is happening! I have noticed the typical regression behaviors around the house since things have settled and all our visitors and helpers have gone. For instance he used to wet the bed maybe once a month if that really he has been so good about it, but now its almost a nightly occurrence, and believe me, we have tried not giving him anything to drink 2 hours before bed time and it still happens, its gotten a little better and he is actually making it to the bathroom most nights now when/if he has to go, but holy frustrating batman! He has also become more defiant, normally I can ask him to do something and he gladly helps or does what ever is asked of him... Not the case these days he will yell in my face or tell me to do it. It gets old fast. These things are frustrating but totally expected. We have new boundaries in our house and that is tough for the little man, and shoot it's tough for me. I had hoped that things were still going well at school until today when I got the call from his teacher, she sounded nervous and I knew she was worried she would flip me out. (I guess I am that mom... the one that over communicates in hopes to make her job easier but really I just come off as a little obsessive, time to lay off the emails. :)) Luckily it was nothing huge but he has been more moody at school, crying easily and not participating when asked to. She was very kind about it all, but I can't help but feel like I suck as a mom. I know it's normal, I can say that till the cows come home, it doesn't make me feel any better. I guess I feel like I should have been able to prevent it all, which thankfully his teacher mentioned that if the child doesn't regress they usually think something is wrong on a bigger scale, so in a way I should be thankful he has regressed. A really long post to say that we postponed him moving classes until his ARD meeting at the end of January. When we meet then we will talk about him moving into the inclusion class, before that meeting I think he will spend two weeks going to the new class, which would mean new teachers and new kids. It will be interesting to see how well he handles the change, as well as how well I handle the change.

Can I also for the record say I hate that he has the label of special ed! I know it doesn't define him, as I was also in special ed, and this school record is closed out when he starts kindergarten, meaning that the teacher won't know about his special ed status unless he still needs help with speech. I realize that the above statement may make me sound mean and or judgmental, but I know how people react when I say that I was in special ed as a child, there is always this "no way..." reaction, when you can tell they are dying to know whats "wrong" with you. Well folks... Nothing is wrong with me. I am a slower learner than most which means I needed a little extra help in certain subjects and I did quite enjoy that hour of study hall in high school. But while I can explain that now easily I always felt like I was some kind of failure then, I wasn't as good as the other students etc. I suppose I really don't want Leland to feel like he isn't as good as other students, I know right now that's not the case, but if he continues in speech (which I honestly don't think there will be a need, he really is progressing nicely) he will start to feel it when he gets to the elementary school if that makes sense. I also feel like special ed can hinder an education, I guess now though they have a better understanding of it than they did maybe when I was in it. After all when I started the program it was 14 years ago, and when I look back I can honestly say that when I was in 8th grade and still having math lessons on adding and subtraction instead of getting pre algebra like my peers that that probably did more harm than help, since I struggled even more with my algebra classes and had to retake Algebra 1 since I did so poorly in it the first time around. I guess I am just worried about Leland having a label, but that is outweighed by how glad I am that he is learning to interact with all types of people and that his teacher (on a good day) writes notes home about how glad she is to have him in her class, that he is a good leader and friend to those in the class with more severe problems than he has. That is enough to make me proud of him and thankful that he has the opportunity to be in the program, I think beyond speech and learning to follow teacher guided activities he is learning that everyone is different, and how to be kind to everyone no matter the disability or label.

Maxwell's Blessing

2011-11-14T17:35:00.006-06:00

Well yesterday we blessed our little guy at church. He looked pretty dang sweet in his blessing gown, one with lots of history and years on it. That little gown is over 60 years old. My mother Gretchen and her brothers were blessed in it. All of my siblings and I were blessed in it. All of my uncles children were blessed in it, as well as my sisters 5 kids and my others sisters 4 kids and now my 2 kids. I am unsure if Annie's little boy was blessed in it, but if he was that makes one more. It makes me happy to think that we have the opportunity to use such a special gown for the blessings, regardless of how many people asked me why my little boy was in a dress. Leland did remark as we were getting Maxwell ready that it was a "pretty girl dress."

Brian did a really excellent job on the blessing. He gets very nervous, and was worried

he would mumble, and while he did speak quietly it

was clear. He blessed our little Max to have strength and courage. A strong testimony and to make the right choices regardless of what others may think of him and to walk the narrow path. (hence why strength and courage are important.) That his Heavenly Father loves him, listens to him and will answer his prayers. A desire to serve others as well as serving a mission to share his gospel knowledge with others. And ended with the blessing that he will take his future wife to the temple to be sealed for time and all eternity. It was a great blessing and I couldn't be more blessed to have them both in my life. So grateful for the power of the priesthood and the blessings it brings into our lives.

Stationery Card

2011-10-30T22:41:00.001-05:00

Herald Tag Green Birth Announcement

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Interesting....

2011-10-29T18:12:00.003-05:00

After Reading my friends birth story for her son, and a few others, mine included... isn't it interesting that we as women pass judgement on each other for how we choose to deliver our children, what method we use to feed them etc. instead of uplifting each other and supporting... We need to snap out of it and just love and support. There are enough things going on after you have a baby, worrying about what someone thinks or is going to say shouldn't be one of them. That is why I LOVE my kiddos doctor. At the one month check up he asked what I was feeding him and I said that today was the last day of supplementing with breast milk. I just don't have the supply and its so overwhelming and tiring to pump and remember to pump when you are out and about. I didn't even have to say that last part in my defense he just nodded noting that he remembered me being concerned about my supply and what formula was I using. No judgement, no questions. Just that he remembered (or had read in the notes before our appointment) that I had been stressed about my supply.

He's Just Punctual. (Very Wordy)

2011-10-29T16:38:00.006-05:00

I know we are a month out but life gets amazingly busy and lets not even start with trying to find my groove... it's lost and may be forever. That is just how it goes I guess. Especially for those of us that had just found our groove! :) Maxwell Gene is here and I wanted to write a little bit of it down because lets face it I don't remember much of Leland's birth story, although I may post what I remember another day just so I have it!

Let me start by saying I started Braxton Hicks contractions at 28 weeks so I thought I was going to be a pro at this whole labor thing. I mean I never got to prove it with Leland since I only labored for 20 hours and it was mild, and then I went in for a c section. (10 of those hours I was sleeping with the help of some fabulous medicine, so not hard at all.) On top of the "fake" contractions "conditioning my body" I lost my mucus plug 5 weeks before Max was due. That said I felt so dumb as I told everyone I was sure I would have this baby any day SO not only was I disappointed but it seemed everyone else was too! I should also note we induced with Leland, so I had NO idea what to expect with labor and didn't want to be "that" mom who showed up to the hospital sure she was in labor only to be sent home. I would be embarrassed by that, because lets just say I have issues.

So my Mom came a week before my due date, because of a lot of different reasons, but the main one was I was struggling with daily life, let me tell you for those who come early or get induced its amazing how uncomfortable you get in just a weeks time. I for one was amazed at the difference between 39 weeks and 40!

So Tuesday the 27th I was willing to try anything to get this baby here. A lady in our ward swore by Castor Oil... I swear I will never touch the stuff again. Although it was nice to not have to worry about having a bowel movement while pushing, never again I say. We also tried some other things but that's just a TMI so moving on. Nothing happened. I felt out of sorts but the contractions just weren't happening. Around 2:30 on the 28Th, my actual due date, I woke up feeling terrible. Long wordy story short from 2:30 to 4:45 I paced my bathroom as the contractions got more and more painful I finally decided I would wake Brian up and just let him know I thought it was time to go, but I wanted to shower, but wanted someone else awake just in case anything went down. (hey I had just read a friends birth story where she had her baby in her bathroom....)

The shower was uneventful, I know you are all breathing a sigh of relief... But the contractions were coming closer together and were much more painful than before so I went to wake up Mom before getting ready myself. She was a nervous ball of energy excited to meet grand baby number 15. Brian the poor soul was not awake enough to deal with it all and instead of turning onto the right road to take Leland to Amy's he auto piloted towards the hospital. I was mid contraction trying to breath and not berate him, I only slightly succeeded at both mind you, but we got to the hospital after dropping Leland off in record time. Side note if your car has no shocks/ struts the ride is much worse than normal when you are in pain. :)

We got to the hospital around 5:45, got into a room around 6 and got all checked out and I was surprised to learn I was still only dilated to a 1, my first indicator that my body was taking its dear sweet time! I was certain they would send me home, I was also certain that in a few hours the pain would be more than I could handle without drugs. Doing a vbac means I was for sure getting an epidural, just in case we had to do an emergency c section, and I don't do well with pain, so regardless of how much better it is for the mother or the baby I was getting one! It was nice to use that as an excuse though...

My best friend Hope came up after she got done at work around 4ish in the afternoon to do birth photography for us. I am glad I had someone I loved and who loved me back to do that as it is SO personal and so incredibly humbling to have someone in the room who isn't blood or helped you get in the situation ;) I am glad to have the pictures even though I think I look terrible in them all. Let me just say the day progressed slowly water was broken at 10 am, I had the most fantastic nurse named Liz she reminded me of my dear friend Rosie, and when she left at 7pm she hugged us all and asked us to bring the baby by sometime since she was off the next 3 days. by 8 or 9 that night I was at my limit, I was a teary mess, I do not do well with endurance with no sure end in sight. Like if they had said, you will have this baby by midnight, I could have handled that so much better but the waiting was making things so much harder. I talked, scratch that, I cried while my Dad talked to me, trying to encourage me from California that I could do it, I felt better after having talked to him but still wanted a blessing. My greatest fear was that something wasn't going to go right or I was going to "fail" at my vbac attempt and have to have a section anyway after all that. So Hope's brother Ben came up and he and Brian blessed me and after that things seemed to pick up.

It was amazing to me that at 10pm when they said we were ready to start pushing how awake and ready I was to tackle that portion of the delivery. I had renewed purpose and the tears stopped, well mostly. They say its just pressure that you are feeling but even with an epidural pressure "hurts" especially when you are running on low epidural and need a "booster" but choose not to because you don't want to wait another 4 hours to walk. Pushing took 21 minutes, granted it felt like forever, but it wasn't. My nurse Jennifer, or was it Jessica... whatever kept telling me to give her all I had and I finally told her I was and to stop asking for it. That got laughs from some of the people in the room, but so did my repeated use of the word FLIP... Brian assured the nurses I was "editing" because my mom was there, which made all of them laugh. And there you have it. If you want the story of the afterbirth you will have to ask my Mom, she loves to tell the story... and so does my doctor. Fun times!

Maxwell Gene Hamilton born at 10:21 (or was it 10:12, I can't remember :)) 9 pounds 1 ounce 21 inches long. He just wanted to make sure he came when he was expected and join the small percentage of babies actually born on their due dates.

P.S. at some point during the day my epidural came unhooked and the medicine was going all over the floor. The only way we caught it was that I was suddenly in more pain than I wanted to be.... Do I get a discount on the epidural??? :)

Birthday Boy!

2011-09-08T14:30:00.004-05:00

Leland turns 4 this month. He also gets a brother... Not sure how he feels about that last one... especially since his brother is due any day, and I personally think it would stink to have to share a birthday with a sibling. I love all of mine but it would still stink... I want my own day dang it! :) I can't believe how big he is getting or how handsome! Sure love this boy!

A few things he loves... Capitan America, Spiderman and above all IRON MAN! He is going to school partial day and learning all sorts of new things. He goes for speech and has a blast. He is one well loved boy and I am thankful for that! Also I love when he plays with his super heros that he talks deeper... thus making duck lips to achieve that goal... its darling!

The Mother of all TMI posts.

2011-08-20T22:52:00.002-05:00

No seriously this is a TMI post so you may not want to read... its about labor stuff..... so be warned.

So last night, or really this morning at the unholy hour of like 2 or 3 whenever I was using the bathroom I noticed that I had lost my mucus plug. This is important to note because one I thought holy heck that is disgusting and two I just wanted to get back to bed as quick as possible, hence the reason I could have cared less about what had occurred. I waited till around noonish to discuss this with anyone that would actually know what the heck that is. I talked it over with Brian in the morning and just told him how gross it was etc but still it hadn't occurred to me that this could be the mucus plug, the thing my doctor doesn't put a lot of faith in it to mean labor will be coming within the next few days. So I wasn't too concerned with it. Only then I started noticing everything around the house that needed to be done and started to feel overwhelmed and then the panic kicked in. SO I will say this now. Sorry Mom... if you come and the house is a mess and in need of TLC I promise I have been working on it... but slowly. I was blessed tonight to not focus on that part of it but to focus on the blessing it is to have a baby SO I am working on that. Anywho the doctor did say that the baby could come anywhere between tonight and 3 weeks now that that's happened. I will keep ya'll posted I am hoping to get a few more things tackled and done before but what I really wanted to remember is that 1. Leland was super needy today. I think that was more of him just needing to know that I still loved him and I failed at the miserably for the first part of the day... Lots of yelling and not taking time for him. But by the end of the day I just sat with him on the couch and hung out. 2. My Dad was super proud of the fact that he knew what a mucus plug was, and what it meant (I for the record am super proud of him for that too... since when I talked to Brian about it he made all sorts of faces) and 3. That I have a wonderful sister who is keeping close tabs on me, and making me promise to take it seriously, while still offering any help I could need. She is pretty amazing.

Nerves

2011-07-23T22:27:00.004-05:00

My little is experiencing the nerves of knowing something is coming... something big. I have been watching him over the last few weeks and have been amazed at his ability to try and process these things. For example, when Brian or I talk to him about the new baby he seems to be happy, if not a little bit nervous but in general ok with it. When other people talk to him about it he gets fidgety and often leaves the conversation. I don't know that he is quite ready to admit that we are getting a new baby. Among other things he has become overly clingy and has recently rediscovered his bear which has not left his sight the last few days. That was his lovey from a while ago, and for like 6 months he could have cared less where that sucker was. I guess I just worry about him and his reaction. He is what I would like to call my gentle giant, he is somewhat soft with those that are smaller than him and has recently taken a liking in his friends new brother. I just hope I do it right for him, meaning I do the transition right, I don't over baby him or under baby him and that he know without a shadow of a doubt that he will always be my baby. I will just have two of them now instead of one. and I want him to know that I will love him always and forever no matter what.

A few things recently that caught my attention when chatting with him.... Last Sunday the 17th we were talking, he was feverish and just laying on my lap and I was asking if I could get my baby anything. With that he sat up and looked at me and said I'm not the baby (pointing to my belly) that is, I am your boy Mom.

And tonight after a cranky Dad got home from work ( I would SO be cranky too after standing out in the heat all day... especially when at 9 am it was already 92 degrees) and had told Leland to get in bed and stay there I had gone to check on him. I walked in and asked if he was ok or needed anything and he just looked at me with sad eyes and said... "Daddy is ANGRY!" poor kid. I explained that Dad was just tired from work and would have had him come in and back me up be he was already in bed. I don't know that Leland has ever put that together so well before tonight. That when we get stern or louder we are more angry. And maybe he has, maybe tonight was the first time he dared to say so! :)

Random

2011-06-08T12:24:00.003-05:00

I need to play catch up with things I want to remember, so while this may not interest most of you it will be a good record for me :)

Leland started swim lessons on Monday this last week, he calls his swim suit his "soup" and his fave part of the lesson is getting the grwings aka Rings that he gets to dive for.

He often tells me he wants to "Squeeze my butts" which translates into squeeze your guts, but it makes me dissolve into laughter every time.

He is obsessed with finding his Dad during the day and often asks me "where is my dad?" and then he tells anyone who will listen the rest of the day that his "daddy is at work" which makes me smile.

He has finally grasped that there is a baby in my tummy and yesterday his baby kicked his head while he was resting on my tummy playing a game on "his Ipad".... I guess I shouldn't have been worried about his dad stealing it after all, it seems I should have been worried about Leland :)

Leland has discovered he loves all Sowa "Soda" and often asks for it and will sometimes even eat something he doesn't want just to get a small glass of it, I have used this trick to get him to eat lunches and dinners, we still haven't branched out from Cereal and Mac and Cheese but we have moved on from Ritz.

He loves loves loves his gold fish, and I love that he does... i often find them stashed in different places around the house and while its slightly annoying I still think its cute.

He LOVES his old Sunday School teacher in our ward and runs to hug her when he sees her, his new teachers seem amazed by him, apparently on Sunday he told them he went swimming with dolphins.... which he didn't. But maybe he had a lovely dream about it ;)

While we were away in Hawaii, Leland stayed with his Mimi and Poppy Hamilton, they set up a tent for him with an air mattress and he was in HEAVEN! He loved it, he called it his cave. They also taught him to tell people where his dad and I were. When asked Leland would respond "Daddy's at the beach, Mommy's at the beach" every once in a while he would tag on "sharks are at the beach and turtles are at the beach but Zebras are at the Zoo". I am pretty sure they also taught him to say the Sun was still awake when we try to put him to bed before 8 p.m. He has also learned in their pool how to use a fun noodle like a kayak paddle when on a raft and can navigate the pool quite well.

On the third to last day of school they sent home a free admissions pass for the Dallas Zoo, Leland finding it in his folder brought it to me and said "look Mom the Zoo! lets go!" I explained that the Zoo closes at 5 p.m. and the animals were getting ready for bed by 7 p.m. he seemed very distraught and wanted to go anyways demanding "Lets just go now!" I think someone misses our many trips to the zoo that he used to have before he was put in school. I may brave the heat and take him for a morning sometime next week we shall see though, I want us both to live longer than next week!

I don't know if its the pregnancy hormones but the amount of love and overwhelming feelings that I am so glad Leland is mine ( I have always been glad, but I needed him to be asleep to feel them so strong ;)) Now I feel them most of the day. This child amazes me, he is growing and learning. He is already as tall as my belly button, and he fits in his almost 7 year old cousins clothes just fine. He is sassy and spunky and just an all around good kid. He loves quickly and if you find favor with him you can do no wrong. He loves his Aunties, both his real ones and his none real ones and often when entering Amy's home yells "Cousins I am HOME!!!!" And when his Hope (I have asked him about this, she is not mine she is his) comes over he says "Yay! Hopie is home!" I am glad he has so many wonderful people that love him and support Brian and I in the raising of him, the free babysitting and the loving on my little guy makes my heart all the more fond of those around him.

Things that make me smile

2011-04-30T10:24:00.004-05:00

We took Leland to the ultra sound to see what we were having... figured it would be a fun experience for him since he is certain we are lying about where this said baby is coming from :) Both Brian and I were talking up the appointment, telling him how excited we were for him to see his baby brother or sister, and what a good brother he would be. When we pulled in he instantly asked... "I go with you?" which he asks most every time we stop the car, as if we have ever left him all alone in the car before... He makes me laugh. He ran up to the office door and tried with all his might to open the heavy door, finally allowing Brian to assist and when he ran into the waiting room yelled out " HEY BABY" the front desk ladies cracked up... Brian and I knew he was excited to finally find "his" baby not necessarily calling them baby... but we let them enjoy the compliment. As we were getting all ready for the ultra sound they had me pull up my shirt and push my pants low on my hips to clear the way and Leland became very concerned that my tummy was hurting... he kept asking "Mom... is dour tummy hurt" I kept telling him it was where the baby was... finally he got up and came over to rub my tummy, and when I asked if he was saying hi to his baby he asked again where he was. I replied in my tummy... Leland looked at me for a minute, then walked up by my head and said "open dour mouf" when I did and he couldn't see anything but normal mouth stuff he matter of factly said... "I check dour feet" and walked down and started wiggling them. Needless to say by the time the doctor came in Leland was no longer interested in what was going on and more and was happily eating his cookies in the chair. But Brian and I are happy to announce we are having another boy. I am waiting for the excitement to build :) I am just happy they reported that he looked great and healthy and he was right on target for the week we are at with no markers for down syndrome (whatever those are I am not sure, but the doctor seemed pleased). Anyhow I leave you with this little gem that Brian captured to send to me while I was out and about the other day. Made me really smile :)

My oh My!

2011-04-16T21:28:00.003-05:00

Today totally overwhelmed. I have no idea why, my lists of the days events don't sound major at all compared to some of the days Leland and I have had. But my oh my, today delivered! I sat down to dinner late, like 7:45 late, and I all I had had for lunch was a bowl of fruit loops. I sat down next to my child who was still up 45 minutes past his bed time and refusing to sleep, and thought over the angry " I'm just done" comment I spewed to Brian over the phone out of frustration that I 1. just wished he was coming home, and 2 was just overly tired and hungry. After all he was just checking on my day before he went to hang out with his friends. And as I sat there I just started bawling. Leland instantly came over to see what was going on and he asked "why you cry mom... don't cry" and patted my leg. I couldn't get a grip on it. I just sat and cried and cried and while I cried Leland kept inquiring as to what happened or if I was ok... he had climbed up into my lap and put his arms around my neck and told me to stop crying, he's ok. and that made me smile.... And I thought we are ok. Its ok for me to cry a little now and then with no real reason, we will still be ok... and with that he asked me to lay by him in my bed, on dads side... Thats his favorite place to sleep after all... On dad's side... We are all good... Leland is fast asleep on his dad's side and I am just unwinding from a long day... and planning to go lay next to my sweetest little in a bit...

Odd....

2011-03-31T15:14:00.002-05:00

So I have this odd feeling like this new baby, while I am totally excited to be having it... is encroaching on my time with my current baby. Doesn't that just sound awful. I guess I will just have to make time for 1 on 1 time with me and my big boy when the new baby comes... that won't be hard because Brian is a baby hog... until they need their diapers changed... ;)

Just a little something....

2011-03-31T15:09:00.003-05:00

That melts my heart and makes me smile every time I see it!

My boy loves to read...

I know I said I wouldn't play catch up....

2011-03-31T15:02:00.004-05:00

But these are first day of school pictures for Leland.

He was so excited his first day, couldn't believe he was lucky enough to ride a bus! We got him all ready then waited patiently for the bus to come. We kept look out in our front room. Once he saw that bus he was gone! So excited he ran the whole way there.

Ms. Chris and Ms. Georgie are his bus driver/ helper. We adore them. They are patient with him, since the novelty of the bus has worn off some days are really challenging to get him on the bus if we can get him on it at all.

And his seat on the bus even comes with a seat belt. He was pretty stoked to be on a bus!

Since then things are going well he has speech a couple times a week. He is making great progress. Talking a lot more and in sentences instead of just demands. I couldn't be prouder of my smart kiddo. Love him to bits!

HI

2011-03-27T20:28:00.002-05:00

Its been a long time since I have posted regularly and I think I just feel too guilty about not posting enough or catching up... SO I am not going to catch up... just start over. :) I have too much to worry about without worrying about the blog.

Today was an interesting day. It went from being 85 to 45 and overcast. I don't mind... heavens knows I don't want the summer to start too early... that would be miserable. But it totally corresponded with my mood. I currently dislike going to church... NO I am not going inactive, I just hate going without Brian and because of his school schedule he is currently working Sundays. Thankfully he graduates in May, but it makes going to church a lot more challenging. My son makes it extremely difficult to be patient, I love him to bits... but he has all of my spunk and independence bottled up inside of him (today as we were late because I was making carrot cake, which I don't even like mind you) but today as we were walking in late to sit with Ame's family as I opened the door (thankfully they were still singing) Leland said totally loud "I'm Here Guys!" and took off to go sit by Ame... which was fine... and everyone who heard him had a good laugh... as I just shook my head and smiled. But then I felt like the whole time I was sitting there I was being judged, he was squirmy and couldn't sit through the prayers for sacrament and got really excited about his water... which he totally said loudly as well. I know its all in my head but its still there. Church is hard for me. I feel totally alone in the ward unless I am with Ame, I know this is not true. That people have tried to reach out but because of our schedule being so different we just can't connect, or not having a car or whatnot. It gets old feeling alone on Sunday's and its hard. And yes I realize thats my fault but still.

I spent two hours this morning making carrot cake... I don't even like carrot cake. But apparently I make a good carrot cake (thanks mom for the recipe) its all from scratch and takes a while and a lot of dishes especially when you are having to grate your own carrots.... And then the plans we had for the cake got cancelled and I was really looking forward to them. I am sure something important came up but still I was ticked that I had made this cake because of special request and now Brian would eat like one row and be done with it.... Not to mention this then meant I had to make dinner. But whatever... trying to be positive.

Then we had some Elders stop by. I am not sure why they keep stopping by but they do... and always on Sunday when they know Brian is at work. Sometimes I wonder if they are trying to catch him at home? Its odd really, they come and stand on my porch and we visit for a while,... they courtesy laugh a lot... and then I tell them nope there really is nothing they can do for me and they go. Its always pleasant but I always feel like they wonder how sane I am when they go. Oh and I ranted about the carrot cake to them... ended it with thats probably just the irrational pregnancy hormones talking, to which one of them said... No it sounds perfectly rational... It made me laugh.

Oh which brings up another concern... I am 20 pounds heavier than I was with Leland... what if I don't show... I realize to all you skinny mini's out there this doesn't matter.... but I would really like to show... I also realize that I am only 13 weeks so it will be a while... but still.

Anywho life goes on... I am trying to change my attitude, its not working.... SO I think I will go dye my hair or sit in a tub... something, anything to try and change how horribly depressed I feel.....

Note I totally didn't proof this before pushing post... but ya'll will survive right?

Announcements...

2011-02-17T08:51:00.003-06:00

Leland would like to announce that he is going to be a....

Its still really early in the pregnancy but I have never been one to keep it quiet for too long. One more month and we are at 12 weeks (thanks for catching that Stacey)....

Finally a new post!

2011-02-15T22:37:00.002-06:00

Well its been a long time in the making this post back in November I had Leland screened for a speech disorder and they found that it would be a good idea to do a full evaluation so we had that scheduled in January. That eval went smoothly and they also found that he would benefit from some help in those areas SO we set up the ARD (asses, review, dismissal) meeting to figure out when my little boy would start preschool with speech help. I knew it would be 5 days a week for 3 hours a day, but I didn't realize we would be playing by the grown up kid rules. We are... My boy can't miss a certain number of days, has to be on time and have his absences excused. I'm not sure why this makes a difference but I immediately thought no more Zoo days.... :( Maybe its just because it makes my little 3 year old seem so big. Since we only have one car he will be taking the bus... I am torn people. I know this is going to be great for him! He will learn so much and grow a lot and that is whats important. But the other part of me is thinking of how many times I have said we just need to let our kids be kids... take them places, get them "unplugged" and let them develop like we did when we were kids.... The nice thing is, if at any point I feel like he needs to be out of school like for good I just have to write a letter expressing that he won't be coming any more. Which likely won't happen as I have heard such good things about this program I am excited that he got into it. That they were understanding about our inability to get him to his "Home Elementary school" which is almost a mile away, and that we also wouldn't be able to get him to school ourselves because we have one car only and Brian has that most of the time. SO he will get picked up at our home for the time being, hopefully that will continue for the remainder of the time he is at school or we remain a one car family. We met Leland's teacher today, and Leland was able to meet her too, and see the class room and all that. It was fun to watch him be so excited about everything. It was fun to watch Mrs. Mary watch him and do a quick analysis of what she thought of our sweet boy. She mentioned she thought he looked like one smart kid and I have to admit I enjoyed that. He will be in good hands with her. I am glad of that, it will make it easier to think of him being such a little guy at such a big school! Ok its not huge but its pretty big for being an Early Childhood School granted it serves the whole district but still he is small... well sort of. Its a blessing that is for sure. I am sure the days will get easier and I will enjoy having the time to organize and get things finally put in their own place! I adore my little tank and I am excited for him to start this new chapter even if it means I cry when he goes... and feel lonely while he is gone. I think he will benefit, he will be able to communicate and I think that little mind of his will just take off! :)

Lame

2010-11-12T00:09:00.002-06:00

Blogging and the thought have blogging and catching up makes me a little antsy. I am sure I will get there again one day when there isn't so much crap going on... but until then SORRY :) but you will all survive....

Bravest Boy Ever

2010-10-10T22:13:00.003-05:00

He had never been off a diving board (that I know of) before our visit to my parents in August... He watched Majel do it once or twice and he was good to go... It was fun to watch him get so excited about it.

Well Well

2010-09-19T01:33:00.004-05:00

Here I am sitting with no toddler to interrupt me and drag me off to another part of the house for some other need so I get to write in peace for a bit. Lets see where to start....

My parents flew me out out to California with Leland so we could have a little vacation... We Love visiting and seeing all the familiar faces and catching up with dear friends. The trip was great and full of laughs...

I got to see Leighann multiple times... and it was SO fun to visit with her and catch up. She is one of those friends that you never really fall out with even if you don't do more than facebook stalk for a year in between hang outs. She makes me laugh so hard, and we had a great time chatting it up and enjoying each others company. She truly is a best friend a girl could have and I am so glad she made the time for me to see her since she was moving that had to be rough!

Speaking of Leighann she told my friend Todd I was in town so he dropped in for a visit one night. That was also fun (a little shocking... but fun) we chatted and caught up on his crazy life as a cop in San Jose... lots of stories! He is looking fantastic and we had lots of laughs about how life was when we were both at BYU-I. I have some pretty fun pictures from then that some day I will post...

I didn't make a whole lot of time for people while I was there because it was mostly a family visit but I did get to reconnect with a dear friend Laura from high school. I ran into her briefly in 09 when I was there at Target with Leighann... it had been 9 years since I had seen her so it was fun to actually get to sit down and chat with her this time around. She is doing fantastic, and looks fantastic! So fun to hear of all her adventures!

Other than that it was really just family. We went to the Zoo which is where most of the pictures are from Quynh brought her kids along since we went on her birthday those lucky little rats got out of school and we couldn't have had a more beautiful day... I adore the zoo and its always so much fun to go with my mom who is the one who taught us to love it as well.

We visited Emily which was just so fun, I adore those kids and I adore Emily. She cracks me up and we always have good talks. We took the kids to a splash park and played a while there. I think Leland loved it more than Em's kiddos but they put up with him. And we had fun celebrating Zack's birthday with them... and lots of yummy food.

My dad also made the effort to take me to the beach where I always feel like I am home no matter the weather or time of day we go. We made it an evening trip and it was foggy and beautiful! We only got to stay for an hour but it was so worth it. Dad got Leland in the sand and playing in it. Which is a fabulous step in the right direction! Seeing as he usually just cries when he is put in the sand....

And some funny happenings while we were there... Quynh was the fave last year with Leland but this year I think he preferred his uncle Gene... I am not sure though... but she did mess with his Legos which is a crime. But its good she loves him. She was pestering him one day close to the end of the trip and trying to look in his back back when he ripped it out of her hands and said "this is mine moron..." guess its really time (if it isn't too late) for me to clean up my act.... they really do pick up on everything. Thankfully Quynh didn't take offence and we all had a good laugh.

Another funny bit is that my dad came home from work early one day to take Leland to the park... Leland had just found the sidewalk chalk in the garage and had decided he would rather stay there and color... me being ingenious told him he was going to which he replied in his most angry voice ever "I DON"T WANT TO GO TO THE PARK" followed by screaming and kicking. Instead of just telling him he could take the darn chalk I hauled him to the car and buckled him in kicking and screaming... I got to go back inside but Dad had to drive all the way to the park with him screaming... until he figured out where he was and got excited. They stayed and played for about and hour and seemed to have a good time... they came home best buddies...

I am so thankful that I got to go home. We are so blessed to have such good grands out in California who love us enough to bring us home for a visit. Thanks Mom and Dad for a wonderful time! Love you both

Sorry I realize the pictures don't match the paragraphs I figured you would be able to forgive me :D

So much to post

2010-09-11T18:30:00.003-05:00

So little time... so here is my list so I will remember what I want to blog about.

~Quynh and Leland's "friendship"

~Pops taking Leland to the park

~Diving Board

~Zoo in San Fran

~meeting Charlie

~Leland's Party

~Robot Pinata
~Issues with words Tramp instead of Champ, Q tips instead of Toothpicks... Hopes iphone app. Feeling overwhelmed... friendship

There is so much more hopefully these will help jog my memories... when I actually have time to sit down and write more.

There is really such a thing as two mama's....

2010-08-12T21:53:00.002-05:00

Amy and I were chatting today or another day ( my brain is SHOT) about mama's and how she and I tended to act as mama's to all of our 6 boys down here, and she got nervous I think and said well you can't have 2 mama's but I beg to differ (can I say right now how grateful I am that Leland will have a sane mama...aka Amy). Today we took our boys to the aquarium where an accident occurred before we even made it inside. I am a freak... and so I freaked out. Leland's wrist somehow got smashed in the van door. He of course choose his sane mama (Amy) to get comfort from and I panicked (Uhmmm when did that happen? I used to be the one who took care of all blood, bumps and bad bruises and now I can't even function when it happens, its like my brain stops completely, guess its good Amy is so close) I panicked that is until I saw the childs face who felt responsible for the accident and then it clicked almost like a switch and I realized I was making it worse for this boy, not the one who was physically hurt not my little boy but for the other boy. He was crushed and suddenly I realized Leland wasn't the only one that needed consoling. I made sure to tell him that is was an accident it could have happened to any of us and not to worry I wasn't mad at him at all. And so as Amy went on being Leland's second mama I went about getting the car locked up so we could go in and see some animals and fish. And as I was locking the doors this boy came around and got a hug from me, said he was sorry and was glad that Leland wasn't old enough to tell everyone who had done it like Noah had when Amy accidentally got his hand in the door. (which is why he remains nameless in this post) It made me smile. And it made me grateful to have my sister back from vacation. I didn't realize how much I depended on her for support and friendship until she was gone for three weeks. So I guess I just want to say how thankful I am to families, to knowing that Leland will grow up (as long as she stays put here in Texas) with a second Mama, who he adores and who I adore. I am grateful that I have someone who loves me here too and who watches out for me and helps me when I need it. Sisters are the best and I only wish my other sisters were closer so Leland could have lots more mama's. Sorry this post doesn't make much sense its all over I think and I am having trouble focusing... So I will leave it where it is.

Awesomest Parents Ever!

2010-08-04T15:34:00.002-05:00

I have the greatest parents on Earth!

I get to go to California at the end of August because they love me!

(or maybe they love Leland the most....)

At any rate I am super excited!

They called me at midnight (Amy assured them I would be up... and she of course was right) to get some info from me. I was pretty stoked and went right in to tell Brian (yes he had to be up at 4 that morning... but he'll live right) I think he is thrilled that I will am getting to go so he doesn't have to listen to me complain about missing my parents and sister and brother who are out there.

It should be noted that I did also call my mom the next day to make sure I wasn't dreaming... and she said I must have been because she doesn't remember that conversation...then she started laughing... Only my mom...

SO EXCITED!

Stole this Idea:D

2010-08-02T18:51:00.002-05:00

My I wants ....

A vacation

To meet Charlie ( My newest nephew)

To suddenly drop 30 pounds I gained while taking hormones

An organized house

A helper with Laundry that does not involve unfolding everything I have just folded (looking at you Leland)

And an extra car;)

And of course to be pregnant

What I got...

An adorable 2 year old (who turns 3 in September)

A hard working Husband ( who keeps a roof over our heads and food on the table, and thankfully clothes on our backs)

A good Family

A car that works

and for now my health!

Trying to be grateful for what you have is hard till even when you realize there are so many people that would love to have what you have. So its something I will have to work on for life it seems to be happy with what I have. God provides for us and maybe if I can let go of my illusion of control I will be grateful for what I have:D

Zoo Again

2010-07-26T14:14:00.002-05:00

We went to the Zoo again but this time Brian got to go with us so we took many of the same pictures but this time we stayed an watched the elephants longer Jenny and Gypsy seem to be more comfortable in their habitat and were out and about today. Brian held Leland up so he could watch them eat and Leland just kept saying "she's eating, she's eating" over and over again. Brian I think tried to explain how an elephant uses her trunk to get food and water to her mouth and Gypsy or Jenny then walked over to their pool and helped herself to some water. We fed the giraffes again today because Brian really likes that kinda stuff, but I think my favorite part was watching Leland "play" with the Lioness. I would tell him not to pound on the glass to which Brian would respond they aren't fish. So whatever a zoo employee was there and would have told us if we were doing something they didn't approve of. I don't know if you can hear it but I tell Leland that the big kitty is playing with him... to which another more stodgy mom informs her kids that the Lion is NOT HAPPY and He shouldn't be doing that. When the girl pressed her mom more she said the Lion was angry. So whatever I guess we all think we know what is best for wild animals.... I am personally just glad there is glass between the Lioness and my son... because as Brian comments she wouldn't be playing without the glass. You can see more pics on facebook... or I will post them here eventually:D

Binkies....

2010-07-25T21:44:00.003-05:00

I know half of my friends absolutely despise that I call them Binkies... because they are pacifiers but whatever you know you still love me. Lately everyone and their dog have been telling me its time to cut the use of these for good. Those of you that know us know he only gets them at church on Sundays (this greatly helps with the noise level during sacrament) and naps/bedtime. Now while I totally agree and he will be 3 here in September there is part of me that just can't let go of his last bit of baby. I have shaved his head so he will be cool and got him learning to drink out of cups (which he is pretty handy at till he starts playing.... this one will take a LOT longer I am afraid) and we have been starting the talks for the potty training. That last one he isn't ready for so we just "talk" about it for now. But still we are moving in the direction of big boy faster than I wanted to. And since we are struggling to get another baby here its even harder to give up the binkies. As someone stated on their blog, its the last shred of baby. Sure Leland still uses diapers but man nothing says baby like needing a pacifier. I think though that once Amy gets home from her vacation and things return to a semi normal happenings we will try to back down the use one thing at a time. That way he doesn't have total withdraw. I guess this post is just to inform those of you who are wondering why it hasn't disappeared yet. All in good time.....

New Exhibit at the Zoo...

2010-07-22T14:37:00.006-05:00

Dallas Zoo has a new Wilds of Africa exhibit. It is fairly similar to San Fransisco's set up but on a much smaller scale... and you can feed giraffes and get right up close to them... as well as getting fairly close to cheetahs and lions. It is pretty awesome. Leland and I braved the heat and went today... and boy was it hot! Leland got to feed some giraffes (his first and probably last time since it is $5 dollars for 3 lettuce leaves, but you gotta let them do it at least once right Amy?) I probably should have waited to feed the giraffes till we went with Brian, but maybe he will get to do it twice that way.

These are the 4 new elephants

This is Leland trying to get in with the elephants he is pretty fond of them.

You can barely see them but Jenny and Gypsy are back in that little cove. I don't think they are yet comfortable in their new exhibit.

Right at the beginning of the trail...

This truck is half in the Cheetah exhibit... so they can actually jump up into the bed of it if they want... but its too hot for them to do much of anything:D

See how close you can get!

Leland was sure the benches were there to help him see:D

I love the way her paws are

Leland likes to talk to strangers and follow them and ask them for drinks....

The cheetahs... I think there were 3

Feeding the giraffes

And of course to round out the event we rode the Merry go round 3 times... He Loves the merry go round... but not as much as fries... all I had to do was mention the fry word and he was ready to go.

With the membership we have we can ride it as much as we want. However now you have to get a ticket printed out at guest services or whatever its called... its not far from the merry go round but having to drag your screaming child in 98 degree heat to get a dumb ticket is not my idea of fun and I may have thrown a little fit of my own. Had Amy been there I could have left him there and run over and gotten all of our tickets but sadly I did and he screamed the whole way. I got a form to tell them how irritated I was about it. If they change policy (granted it really wouldn't have been difficult if I had been made aware) they really need to let their members know!

This last picture Leland is asking for Amy. He knows she is usually there with us and it was a little sad for him when he realized she was really not there. Also when we pulled into the zoo he started saying where's Amy... he has been trained well:D

:D

2010-07-21T21:37:00.003-05:00

A littles laughter is the best medicine out there for the blues!

What is my deal!

2010-07-10T14:09:00.005-05:00

People I need some ideas of other ways you cheer yourself up instead of ice cream and chocolate! My sister and her family are leaving for 3 weeks to go on a fun road trip and I am stuck all alone in Texas for those long 3 weeks with no chance of a vacation or break for us. See we are saving up for a big Lamoreaux family to-do next year, where ever that may be, and we are also trying to save for a new car SO that leaves no funds for anything exciting like a vacation! (sorry to all those English whizzes that are cringing at my use of the comma.... I hope you can forgive me!)

I suppose I should look on the bright side. I can go to the lake and go sailing with my Father in law, who has a super nice sail boat. That means we can swim in the lake and other fun things. Although I am a huge wimp about lakes and my baby and it super stresses me out. So maybe we will just go to their pool:D I can borrow Amy's van and go to the zoo, just me and Leland, that means if we over heat we can head out and not have too many people disappointed in the short trip. I think I will also have Brian take a few days off for while Amy is gone so we can do some fun things as a family. Maybe take in some kid movies and other fun things.

But I have been in this funk for so long its hard to see a light at the end of the tunnel. Guess I just need to keep pluggin along. As for my son he is a natural born sailor. These last pictures are from our 4th that we spent out on the lake. Mimi is so good to take him to the front of the boat where he kept her busy by pointing to all the doggies that were on the other boats.

The above picture is the epic battle of all three of us trying to get his shirt off to keep him cooler because he has to wear a life jacket and those suckers are hot! As you can see below we only succeeded in getting his shorts off... That shirt was NOT coming off.

I super love this picture!

Remember that nest? and other randomness...

2010-07-07T14:02:00.004-05:00

It held 3 babies! They were so cute and fluffy! All of them grew up and flew away with in a matter of weeks I think it was 3 or 4 weeks (I imagine its because they no longer fit in the tiny nest their parents built:D)

Leland has acquired a pair of real boots thanks to a family friend who is so kind to us to share their hand me downs! :D

Our fun back yard complete with my wonderful swing. Its nice if the evening cools off enough or there is a storm rolling in. Its a good place to meditate... and of course when Leland is splashing its a good way to stay cool.

I bought this cheap sprinkler head at wal-mart for like 2 dollars and Leland loves it. I have to admit that I am just confused as to why he doesn't like being out in the rain if he can handle a sprinkler. The other day we were leaving him with Amy and he was standing out by our car and her van waiting to get in and it started raining Leland promptly shoved Amy out of the way and climbed into the car. We all had a good laugh... well except for Leland.

I bought it to put under the trampoline... I know all you other moms out there are gasping right now. How could she do that its going to make jumping so much more dangerous yadda yadda yadda... Truth be told its safer than him getting heat stroke... But guess what he doesn't like being on the trampoline when its wet so we just run in the sprinkler. I am sure you are all jealous of me weed boarder its pretty awesome if I do say so myself. And its the reason that Brian got a weed eater for fathers day!

I LOVE TEXAS STORMS.... but I HATE THE TEXAS HEAT....

I guess I will just have to deal if I want the storms though huh?

This is my friends kiddo... We swap babysitting because Q is only 3 months younger than Leland and we are both poor so it helps to have someone willing to do it for free:D He never takes a pacifier but Leland had one so he helped himself and I thought it was darling. He is also wearing my glasses again too cute! Q is super petite so Leland scares the pie out of him, so when I watch him it mostly consists of Q following me around... I have the cutest shadow ever!

We Love the Zoo

2010-07-07T11:30:00.006-05:00

I love this kids smile... its infectious and he really does look awesome! I am so glad that Z loves me. I love him! He told me on Sunday as he cuddled in and asked me to scratch his hair (rub his head) that he was sure I was his aunt because he loved me so much. He can always make me smile.

These two girlies had a good time together....

Which forced poor E to hang with Leland... Someday they will be best of friends and Amy and I will be in trouble!

We have funky bugs in Texas

I can never get these to upload right but the above picture happened after Amy realized I was letting him cry it out on the ground that could be dirty:D

Leland often has little melt downs when he is tired and or too hot... I believe we could file this one away under both of those titles:D Amy had to get him out of it as I was too frustrated to even deal. Its a good thing I live so close to my sweet sister who Leland lovingly refers to as Mom most of the time. She swears its because he hears all his cousins calling her mom and I swear its cause he loves her more:D

Z needed to cool off... this seemed like a good way!

Yes I rode a Camel. They are not comfortable. I would much rather ride a horse and I am scared of horses... they are beautiful and lovely from a distance but up close they make me nervous... I suppose I am not so much afraid of them since I have ridden them but I have a healthy respect for them!

I asked the guy if it would hold me... he looked nervous... hey I mean I wanted to not give the poor camel back issues forever. He assured me it would be fine.

This is a hit... too bad it costs $5 dollars a pop. Too much to do every time but cheap enough to do once:D

They moved the Elephants inside to their new exhibit...

We really like the Elephants... we just wish the exhibit was already open!

We sure have some darling children!

Poster Child

2010-07-07T11:04:00.003-05:00

For Mt. Dew... admit it, its cute... No I don't let him drink it. but he loves my hat:D

So Behind

2010-07-07T10:20:00.002-05:00

Do you ever feel like blogging has become a chore? Yeah I am there I am so behind that its right up there with cleaning out the garage and guest room, hanging curtains and decluttering:D! So much has happened these last few months most of them not super important but I will take what I have pictures of and blog about it some day. We went sailing for the 4th of July, Leland mind you had a 102.9 fever (yeah I win the good mom award) he loved every minute of being on that boat even though it lasted till 10:45p.m. and he didn't nap at all that day. Turns out he could have fifths disease. YAY but its common and should go quickly we are on day 3 of the rash and it usually hangs around for 5 or 6 days so hopefully his cute little face will be looking beautiful again soon. Brian had a birthday and in two months our littlest will have his birthday. He is going to be 3. I cannot believe it. The one thing I really want to remember is his love of his yegos (legos) catalog that he "reads" while he gets his diaper changed or is just laying on the floor. I will try to get a picture of this as it is darling. I think for him it is as good as owning all those things in there because when he sees it he says My Yegos! and runs over to it. I will get to posting today. Our summer is getting hotter so I will have more time indoors to post. Mainly and sadly because lil Leland got his mama's genes and he over heats at the drop of a hat.... and since the last two summers I have nearly given my baby full blown heat stroke I think this summer we will take it easy.... and figure out fun indoor activities... any mom's have any advice?

Just for you Dinks

2010-06-19T01:21:00.003-05:00

That way you don't have to scroll down:D

My baby officially is fabulous! I love him more than anything!

Curiouser and Curiouser (TMI possibility)

2010-06-09T13:25:00.004-05:00

SO my body has decided it really is broken and to show me that it decided to start shedding the lining a week after it had already shed the lining. I went in for a sonogram and discovered (thankfully) that my lining is super thin and there is no good reason for it to be shedding again this early. I say thankfully because there was concern that it could be the start of something nastier like a miscarriage. So yes I can handle a little emotional stress whereas that would have been a HUGE emotional stress. SO in order to stop the bleeding I go on birth control... and given the number of women I know who in the past year have used it and gotten pregnant I won't say its impossible for me in the near future to bring #2 kiddo into the world I will just say it will at least be a month before I have to worry. I suppose this was good for me. I learned a few things this week. The first is when you think you could be starting into a miscarriage but don't actually know the stress of it will cause you to have really freaky dreams... and second I learned that Brian really think we should be back on hormones (once of course we get this figured out) so I guess we have some praying to do as a couple to see what way we want to proceed. It is a really hard thing and those who have taken clomid totally get that. Its hard on you and your body, and your marriage and you child, so it should not be taken lightly. Anywho if I have been a tad bit testy lately I apologize its been a stressful week of waiting and not knowing whats going on. Since people always ask how long we have been trying I thought I would just jot it down. I figured out that we felt like we were ready to have another kiddo around Leland's first birthday and have been trying ever since. So come September it will be 2 years. Not as long as some people but long enough for me.:D

On that super happy note... I leave you with this.... Hope it made you smile... it makes me smile:D

GALVESTON

2010-05-11T23:05:00.003-05:00

Oh yes it needs to be in all CAPS! It was a blast! Thank you so very much Amber and Amanda for planning such a wonderful birthday surprise for me... and for knowing me well enough to give me a little warning even if it seemed lame at the time. It really helped my anxiety I was sure everyone was talking behind my back!

My faves of this trip were

one being on the Beach... You know how much I miss it! It was so wonderful to be back and feel a little connection to home... even if the scary homeless guy did ask me for Coke... and clarified that he wanted Coca Cola when I looked at him like he was a nut job.

Second.. The long wait at Rain Forrest Cafe... that allowed us to watch all the girls trying to dress up way too old for their age for prom... and of course the Icees YUM and of course all the pictures!

third... almost dying by seagulls and spotting dolphins... ok we didn't really almost die but it was a close call! And of course me swearing that if we saw any dolphins I would be quiet so as not to draw attention to ourselves so we could enjoy them all by ourselves... then of course when I saw one totally freaking out and swating at Amanda to turn around she was missing it!

fourth... our late night talks in the hot tub. Its so nice to know you aren't alone on certain things. And to break the rules a bit. We certainly checked into the right hotel... and the front desk guy was great to tell us hey the pool isn't open but keep it down... SO FUN

fifth the drive down... I mean who wouldn't enjoy that. Lots of time to talk.. Jam out to songs we would all like to admit we don't know... and of course Buck-ees.

sixth... Souvenir shopping.... nuff said!

Seventh... the whole trip rocked! Thanks so much! Words cannot express how wonderful it was for me to take a little break for me, and to have such good company was wonderful! Thanks Ladies! I can't wait to see the pictures!

This is the only picture I have that relates~ this is the souvenir I brought home for Leland. Its a 6T... can't tell can you... yeah he isn't even 3 yet.... YIPES!

Birthdays....

2010-05-11T22:34:00.003-05:00

We have had one a month for a while... Mike comes in May too... Plus Brian's little sister turned 13 on the 10th of May! We had a little celebration with her the other day, and with the celebration we celebrated me and Mothers Day for Mom Green and Myself as well as my birthday! We had some fun and some good laughs.
Caleb started off the birthdays He is a DOLL!

And Michael turned 12 which is a big mile stone in our church! He was ordained a Deacon last Sunday and sadly I missed it since I was out of town (more on that later) but Brian was able to stand in so that was a good experience!

And finally I turned 28 today! Brian likes to remind me how close to 30 I am getting... must seem funny to him being only 23 but let me say this... his time will come and much like his Dad he hates aging... I will have my revenge yet! Muahhhhhh. I had a VERY pleasant day today! I was surprised around 8 or was it 9 either way I was surprised to find Amy on my door step asking to take Leland for the morning so I could have it to myself. Then she offered me the use of the car... Sweet! I got to go to Target all by myself! I win! Then I picked up Which Wich for me and Amy (sorry Ame lame mothers day present I know) and we got to steal a quick lunch together. Brian got off work early and we put Leland and Eli down for nap and Amy picked both up around 3 so Brian and I could spend some time just me and him. We went to Wal-Mart and picked up my swing that the Hamilton's and Brian got me. SO FUN! When I get it set up I will post pictures... Then we went to dinner and frozen yogurt. Brian got his hair cut and tomorrow I get to look forward to the Zoo! YAY! Overall its been a wonderful day! I am excited to see what this next year holds... even if it takes me one year closer to being 30. I wouldn't trade my life for anything!

And finally.... I can finally get my hair into pigtails! SO EXCITING!

Its always fun when Grandma and Grandpa Come!

2010-05-11T22:21:00.007-05:00

My Parents came in April! I LOVE it when they come. It is always so fun. Gramps made sure his laptop had lots of fun cartoons for the boys to enjoy! They often swarmed him when he brought it down even if he needed to get some work done :D
We went to the movies and saw How to Tame Your Dragon with all the kids, I LOVED that and then we also did Gatti Town, they have a train that goes around the parking lot and we rode it with the two littlest a least a million times.

They loved it! The best part since I hurt my back was the trampoline getting put together. YAY! It has been so much fun! Its starting to get real warm here so this last week we have used it less but believe me we usually jump once or twice a day! Its pure joy for Leland! I absolutely love spending time with lots of my family! Thanks so much for coming out mom and dad! I love you to bits!

Z and I barely workin :D

Leland loved getting some one on one time with his Gramps while I visited with my Mom and Brian they watched Monsters Inc on his Iphone...

We also did a girls night out, where Amy and Mom surprised me with an early birthday celebration. There was so much laughter shared and a lot of delicious desserts shared. I am so glad to know you ladies! We need to do that again! This time in June when Emma comes. That will be a good time! I loved laughing so hard I cried multiple times! Amazing! Thanks to Amy and Hope for orchestrating it and Mom for paying for the treats! Loves to all!

Life Happens

2010-05-11T22:05:00.003-05:00

It happens too fast for me to keep up with. I keep reconnecting with people from my past and finding out hurtful things. Things that make me cry and want to confront the offenders. Maybe I need to stop reconnecting. Although some of it has been healing. My friend Mark has been an amazing help in all of that. I never thought that it may help to first forgive myself for being in whatever situation and then work on forgiving the offenders. I realized the other day that so much of Idaho is a blur... I spent like 3 1/2 years there or something and can't remember much of it. I have blocked it out, tried to erase it. Sure I have several fond memories but many more that hurt. Its not a fun process but I am getting there ever so slowly and my out look on life is changing. Its refreshing. I miss looking for the good instead of the bad. I think so often when the crap starts piling on I just give up. Its evident in my housework and my mothering abilities. I know I can be an amazing mom because the examples I have from my mom and sisters are just that amazing. They are inspiring, so with that I will continue and hope my metamorphosis ends somewhere happy! I often get tagged as having depression and guess what... ever since that day back in 2001 in the therapy office at Ricks I have used it as a crutch as an excuse. Yes I have depression but not the debilitating kind I get what everyone else suffers from that whole seasonal issue as well as when I get in tough situations. In other words I handle it quite well most of the time. And I have sweet people around me like Brian and Amy who know when I need to be encouraged to be in the sun... even if its cold outside, or to forgo dieting for the night and have a night out with my girls. I have some friends here who are irreplaceable they consider me family and I consider them family. I am blessed and as of today I want to work towards becoming happy again... I can do that. With my God and Husband and family who support me endlessly I can do it... and after all who couldn't smile when they looked in the face of this little boy...

he is absolutely my pride and joy. I want to make sure he knows how to be positive and he knows that when hard times come and things seem impossible there is a place to turn to and He will help carry the burden.

Catch Up

2010-05-09T23:06:00.004-05:00

I have so much to post about I thought I would make a little list... I promise to work on it within this next week:D

My parents trip out

Michael turns 12

Caleb turns 10

Leland is just dang cute...

Trampoline

My mothers day/ birthday trip :D

and thats all I can think of but I know when I upload the pictures I will have more!

2010-05-09T23:06:00.000-05:00

Thanks to Amanda and Amber I adore this song. I probably would have never stumbled across it... Such a beautiful story. And she is amazing. I love her voice... This is live... and she does beautifully! Not like some singers we listen to these days....

That silly Bear...

2010-04-07T20:55:00.005-05:00

This little bear was purchased a while back I believe I picked it up at a good discount at Target for Valentines day for the kidlet. He took to it like no one would believe (the only thing to be this loved is his softy) He has needed it every night since to sleep and he naps SO much better with it. Not that it always works but if he is having a hard time I can usually find his bear outside of his crib. (his dad hasn't gotten that idea yet) Recently Brian and I became more aware of this by watching him pull it out of his crib every time and carry it with him. We often have to take it in the car... and I usually even make him leave it there so we won't lose it. As a back up plan we decided we needed two of the same bear. I went to Target and looked at all their shelves of sales to find no bear. Went online to their website (because some lady at Target told me they usually keep stalk of it there for MUCH longer than they do in the store...) she was wrong by the way. I called multiple Targets in our area hoping one had one hiding away somewhere and then I gave up. I remembered Ebay and went on and looked for this little bear. The only 3 listed were pretty much not an option. Two of them by the same seller were marked at $27.00 + $7.50 shipping... uhmm I got this bear for like nine something... it was originally $20 I think. The other one you ask... was USED.... uhmmm even more no. I was about to swallow my pride and buy the really expensive one when I decided I would wait a day and call a few more Targets just to make sure. Well no luck... when I got back online much to my disbelief I couldn't find ANY. Someone must have actually bought those overpriced bears apparently they are "rare," so I tried a few alternate searches and the last one revealed this little beauty he was priced at $14.99 + $7.50 for shipping. I bought him that instant. It was a little bit of a tender mercy. When we pulled up tonight the package was on the door step. I got it and opened it while Leland was napping. When he woke up and came out I had forgotten I had left him on the rocking chair and Leland got this silly grin on his face... looked at me then ran back into his room... came back out and shot towards his new bear... he picked it up and loved it for a minute and then ... you guessed it he left it. Guess we need to break this duplicate lovey in before he will love it as much as the original;)

Easter

2010-04-03T16:26:00.008-05:00

Lots of pictures in this one guys sorry! We spent Saturday morning with Amy's family.(Since her blog is private I will refer to her boys by their first initial only.) I love love love being so close to such an amazing sister, and all the fun we have and the friendship that we have. She is great with my Leland and patient with me... always a plus! I told her I didn't really get anything for Leland and when we got to her house there was a basket ready for him. As you can see below he LOVED it...

He has one half eaten cadbury egg in his mouth and two (one big and one small) cradled in one hand while he is deciding what to do with a candy bracelet.

M made this cool "camo egg" Amy and I realized on Thursday that we didn't get any pictures of the egg dying... I think Amy at least got one of the eggs and dye on the table to prove that we had done it:D

We emptied out the baskets into the white bags to use the baskets for egg hunting

E came to ask Brian for some assistance with a glider that he got in his basket

The 4 older boys with their baskets

Leland showing his candy off

All six of them together

Z is always happy!

Mike helped E find eggs. Each boy could find 15 plastic eggs and 10 hard boiled... that should tell you how many we dyed and filled. Amy and I had filled the plastic ones with loose change rather than "filler candy" this year because it never gets eaten anyway.

Z may be happy but he isn't the most observant little guy:D

The older boys were told they had to look higher first and C shows off the monkey in him... The two littlest got to scour the ground first to see what they could find.

I so wonderfully cut out the egg that was perched on the fence but Z is reaching for it...

N counted his eggs numerous times since they had a limit. This is totally him... wanted to make sure he followed the rules.

Michael had just discovered that the plastic eggs held loose change

I adore these pictures of Leland... so there are a few of them

C decided to check the slide with his bum:D

Leland started out on the trampoline... Amy was a little dismayed as the backyard wasn't the best place to have an egg hunt... but I think it worked out swimmingly!

So cute Brian and Leland working together

Finally found one on his own

E climbed with the assistance of Mike to retrieve the eggs from the climbing wall!

Brian couldn't resist helping

Amy's cute new cut... She and I took pictures of the whole thing

Counting the loot... I think all the boys got at least $10 dollars from this maybe less... but still a good deal of change adds up....

We had a blast being together as a family and Uncle Mike reminded us of the true reason for Easter. Christs resurrection and his love for us, He died so that we may live again. How grateful I am for that knowledge.

2010-03-24T23:28:00.001-05:00

4 days late but still not pregnant... this roller coaster is getting OLD

Bake sale endeavors

2010-03-16T23:51:00.002-05:00

Amy signed me up for the Young Women bake sale... which is fine since I love to bake... However if I knew how seriously these people take it I may have kindly declined! I felt like such a dork taking my cake that looked like nothing special at all when these people went all out not only with what they made but how they packaged it. I guess I know for next time. Anyway I made two things. I made red white in blue cup cakes in patriotic cupcake cups. And the always a hit tie dye cake.I made two circle cakes and cut the tops off so I could stack them and make it pretty this top came off really thin so I decided to share.. the above picture caught him mid happy dance....
He is pretty sure I am just joking with him and will be taking it away...
but is pretty pleased that I left it with him... You can kind of see that this one had the heart on the top(in yellow).... not that it matters since you cover the thing and icing and you can't tell what it is till you cut into it and the design doesn't run deep... but its fun for me never the less... This mixed with Leland drinking food coloring made for fantastically fun colored pooh... I resisted the urge to take a picture for you all but it was like electric blue... pretty cool:D

2010-03-16T23:48:00.001-05:00

This is what happens when I leave these two home alone.... would you look how tall my 2 year old is compared to his Dad! Crazy!

Girl Scout Cookies

2010-03-16T23:45:00.002-05:00

This is what happens when you put the girl scout cookies up on the shelf... He clearly saw he could help himself while I was taking a potty break... and he did... I am just glad he left the monitor on the desk! You should note that he removed the key board so he could have a bigger place to stand....

Zoo Zoo Zoo....

2010-03-16T23:17:00.006-05:00

We love going to the Zoo... so at the sight of good weather we packed up our kiddos (ok Amy only packed up Eli...) and we invited along little Camden and we all went to the Zoo. Amy upgraded our membership to a "passport" and that means we can ride the monorail and carousel as many times as we want... HOW COOL IS THAT. She is amazing anyway we headed in to do the Monorail first thing and it was closed till 11 so we went to meet up with our fave silverback gorilla and he didn't dissappoint. Patrick was right up close. This time Leland and Eli didn't seem to be so afraid of him once I went over into this little corner with them and they got right down next to him. It is AMAZING to see him up close and if you live in the Dallas area it is worth going to see him...
Amy loves seeing him so close to. It is really neat to get to be so up close with such a huge animal. I love love love this picture of Eli right up close... he is looking at the school kids but he was more wishing they would leave. I think he really enjoyed Patrick this time!
We had to get a group shot and poor Camden was NOT comfortable at ALL with it. She was shaking so badly... poor little girl... she will probably have a fear of gorillas now...

Then or course there was the Epic Battle of being able to turn the crank at the penny press. Leland had been over there playing with it for some time (and a school group of first graders kept pulling Leland away until I got loud enough for the teacher to hear... oops...)

Camden was a bystander who kept looking back sure Amy or me would come to break up the fight.

The battle Clearly ended when Eli shoved Leland and got his hand a little too close to Leland's mouth and Leland chomped down... Poor Eli! Then we finally got to ride the monorail... most of the animals weren't out so we were glad we didn't pay for it!

Amy got stuck by Leland who is the hardest on the monorail... that whole sit still thing is really hard for him!

We then headed to the childrens Zoo and played there for a while but it was SO crowded because of all the school field trips that we headed out to the carousel and rode it 3 or 4 times

Little Eli doesn't like the ones that go up and down... but one that goes in circles... totally his cup of tea... only its a nest... but there was nothing clever for that

Leland LOVES riding the up and down ones... but didn't mind riding with Eli either. Poor Camden didn't get to rid in the nest because Leland didn't want her to touch the steering wheel thing in the middle...

Amy riding with Eli and Camden... they are good buddies....

You can tell how many times we rode it by all the different animals and benches they sat on:D

Robin's eggs

2010-03-16T23:04:00.004-05:00

I don't know about Ya'll but it seems everyone has a fave Easter time candy and mine since I was little is Robin Eggs ( I don't put peeps in this category because they started making them for every holiday so I don't have to wait a whole year before I can get those... yes I know some of you just gagged when I referenced peeps:D) Anywho I always buy a bag when I see them first appear on the shelves (or three) because I am so excited, and as I pop them into my mouth I remember that when I was little I used to lick them and then paint them on my lips like lipstick with my sisters (funny I would never dare use lipstick now because I am uneducated in the ways of makeup!) but its a fun memory and then I realize my tongue has paid the price... all that sugar and malted milk ball goodness does not get along with my tongue and it usually hurts for the rest of the day (maybe that is a sign that I am eating too many at one sitting) I set the bag up high enough thinking Leland wouldn't see it... but boy was I wrong...

I had gone to put away some laundry so I would have a clothes basket to move the stuff out of the dryer so I could move our freshly washed garments into the dryer and start a new load... and when I came out I found this... He was covered in blue drool... It didn't so up well but it was pretty gross my friend!
SO I threw him in the shower and went back to putting the laundry away only later when I had finished enough to go and switch the laundry did I realize that I had left it open and the ones Leland couldn't eat he had tossed in with my clean garments... (it should be noted that I had spent most of the previous night up cleaning up puke... from my carpet and moldings and walls and his crib... ) So I may have come a little unglued at this sight... just wished I had thought clearly enough to snap a picture of my newly dyed garments although i suppose its better that I didn't... given the nature of the clothing. Anyway after a good wash in bleach they all came out fab and he will live to tell the tale...

*I should note the green stuff on the bathroom wall is crayon that is made for that... I promise its not something funky growing on our tiles.... and that fabulous shower curtain was a gift... who knew Ralph Lauren did Leopard print? It should also be noted that I LOVE it:D

Sickie....

2010-03-16T22:50:00.002-05:00

Leland was pretty much sick for the month of February, and it was a ROUGH month for me. One weekend in particular was super hard... starting with Wednesday and going through to Sunday Leland had a fever that was usually over 101.8 since he doesn't normally run fevers I knew my baby was pretty sick... although he still had the energy to be pretty dang active... totally sending mixed messages. But he had his moments where all he wanted was to be held. On a Friday we took him in I think that is when this picture is from... you can tell he isn't feeling well. He wasn't sleeping in his room so I propped a very sleepy baby into the rocker and locked it in place while I did some research on line.
The doctor told us it was all virus related and that we would need to do breathing treatments for the next two months. Most days we had to hold him down screaming and it is SUPER hard to do when you just have one person at home. When Brian was home in the evening it was much easier. But he is just so strong that trying to immobilize him is a feat let alone trying to hold a mask over his mouth. Every once in a while there would be a total fluke where he sat super still and all by himself... but those are few in far between, in fact I had to take a picture to immortalize the fact that he could sit still if he wanted to!
It has been a long haul and we are still doing breathing treatments but holy am I glad to be done with the actual sickness.

It should be noted that after a few days of being in the house we were so cooped up we decided to run to old navy (yes it had been 24 hours since his last fever) and he was fabulous in Old Navy... guess I should have called it quits but NO I saw a sale add in the Carters window across the parking lot... and he totally YAKKED on their carpet( his coughing fits usually lead to this behavior so no I was not sharing the flu)... and all they had for me to clean with was super thin paper towels... I am only slight embarrassed that I cleaned it the best I could and left it... You could still totally see it when I left. I have been a little tempted to go back by and see if they got it out or if they too left it... maybe I will wait a little longer:D

Oh man!

2010-03-16T22:41:00.000-05:00

I have so much to catch up blog about... maybe I will get to it tonight if I can find my camera... and the cord to transfer the pictures... but it will come soon:D

Wahoo!

2010-02-23T12:05:00.002-06:00

Ok This is my trying to put a positive spin on starting my period:D TMI sorry should have warned you! I read some excellent websites recently that helped me understand what was going on with my body and I took some form of hope that I didn't take clomid and I STILL got my period! Yep thats right No clomid in the month of January and I STILL got it! Thats GREAT! I am starting a hormone spit test that will chronicle the time between my cycles to fully pinpoint what hormones are freaking out. So this is good. I was only sad for one day which is also good, and it helps the Brian is starting to understand my emotions a little better. So my friends there is now Hope at the end of my tunnel something I had not expected to see so soon. For that I can thank my Heavenly Father for hearing my prayers and sending some WONDERFUL friends who may not be understand but listen as I try to talk myself out. Plus He is helping me in more ways than that and I am grateful for that every moment of every day. Well I suppose I had better get moving! I have to get out size 4 t for my 2 and a half year old (well almost a half) he is too tall really for the 3 t and they squeeze his waist a little too tight for my comfort! Off to dig through bins of clothes! Wish me luck!

Gram made Leland a Sweater!

2010-02-19T13:01:00.003-06:00

This reminded me of Once there was a snow man.... tall tall tall

In the sun he melted melted melted

Small small small:D

I think he looks dang cute in it! Thanks Mom! We love it!

Some things

2010-02-17T23:55:00.002-06:00

I just don't want to forget are how cute it is that every time I fold my arms Leland does to and he waits for me to pray.... we pray over a lot of things now including snack... its also darling when you start to pray and he starts mumbling the words along with you. He says AMY for AMEN... and whenever he sees Amy pull into our driveway the excitement is hard to be contained. Its fun to watch him with her. He also adores Mike which makes me laugh because I don't know how Mike feels about him.... but its cute to watch.
Some of the phrases he has now: I love you, I want chips, I want ki ki (candy...derived from Kit Kats) I want a binkie (he only gets them when he is in his crib) and I want my blankie or Ba..... Its hot and my favorite... I wanna tuby... ok its dang cute when he says I love you too.
He has a lot more but those are just some of my faves. He really is starting to talk a lot... won't be long till I can't get him to sit quietly.

Leland loves to be outside... and Saturday he decided it looked warm enough to go out and let himself out the back door. I must not have locked it but he has never taken the wood out to open it before (it wedges in really well) so that was a little amusing till I saw him covered in muck... wish I had thought to take a picture... I think he was happy to get in a bath to warm up after that little outing.

Leland also likes to tell people where their eyes are by sticking his finger in them while he tells you what they are. He knows nose and we are working on mouth and ears. I have been told he does both of those last two but I have never seen them so I don't know for sure if its true.... but its a pretty credible source so I will take their words for it!

Today we had Eli over for a play date in the morning... and Leland dumped out two smallish things of Sunny D on my carpet... I of course yelled... a lot and swatted his bum twice... this is not a new thing for him... he does it all the time.... and its getting really really old... so today I kind of decided (which really stands for I was so mad.....) that it was time to drive it home... this IS NOT something we do in our household (mainly because I am worried he will do it at someone elses house) anyway after I got done telling Leland rather loudly that we don't dump out our drinks... Eli spoke up real quietly from behind and said "I love you Allie?" I am sure he thought he was in trouble too... poor kid. But it made me laugh so hard I forgot I was angry... and we played some more. (Leland was headed for his crib)

We had Kinsington... (did I spell that right Lauren?) over yesterday to play with us and Leland was pretty fascinated by her. He thinks she is pretty awesome... and he loved all the gear she came with:D

Snow plops and flakes

2010-02-17T23:31:00.005-06:00

We had snow here in Texas... not our light dusting but full on snow... I woke up and my world was blanketed in snow... Poor Brian had to work in it... which wouldn't be so bad if he had a job where he was inside! But nope he works outside supervising the gas station... I got pictures in the wee hours of the morning looking at a white Costco parking lot! I was so excited because usually when it snows in Texas its just a light dusting and it is gone later in the day. But this time it SNOWED all day... I know nothing like what the East coasters are having or the Midwest but still its fun for us once in a while to get snow.

Leland is NOT a fan of walking in the snow... he just isn't a fan of walking in anything that moves under his feet really so Brian and I forced him too... I know we are GREAT parents. I held his hand at least.... (and yes I am aware of how bad I look in that picture... apparently Brian missed the how not to take a horribly unflattering photo of your wife class) This was the beginning of our snow plop... which is what we called it because it looked nothing like a snowman by the time we were done.... We couldn't get the middle to firm up enough to hold together so it kept falling apart!

This is Leland not being very impressed with it:D

He was gathering snow to try and help us make it stand a little firmer....

This is the first picture we took out in the snow... I am a super awesome mom because I didn't realize that the red dots all over Leland's face were a staph infection... we got it all under control now but it was stressful for a bit!

Overall I am going to say he loved it... this was his face almost the whole time... Darling!

Dad was even a good sport and came out to play... I had let him nap right after work and went to wake him up to come out and play but he wouldn't so I may have thrown some snowballs at our bedroom wall to help him get up:D It worked... he came out and was happy to play for a bit! I know that looks like he is going to chuck it at Leland but he threw it at me and because I was taking pictures he actually hit me....
You can tell in this picture that it has the follow through to come my way! At least there weren't any rocks in it!!

Random...

2010-02-17T23:26:00.002-06:00

Leland is almost as long as our garden tub now... but more importantly it should be noted that he is laying back in the water.... I tried in vain to get him to lay back on me this last summer when we did mom and me swim classes and he refused... now he thinks its fun... go figure....

He has started to hand me my phone and say cheese... meaning I had better take his picture with it or he will get impatient... Here he is helping me read some paperwork for insurance crap... by helping I do mean coloring all over it with that pen in his hand and making it hard for me to read at all!

Amy sent us home with a Mack ( I think to borrow... but maybe to keep... who knows) and for Valentines day she got Leland Cars... so he now watches it at least once a day with his Mac... that Eli introduced him to. We think its pretty darling...

(All of these pictures are taken on my old phone and they didn't really come out well but at least you can kinda see him!)

Crafty....

2010-02-17T23:18:00.003-06:00

Crafty is not really my thing... however I did make this curtain tie... along with 3 others to go in our front room... gotta have a little bit of fun with it. Plus I just really love Zebra print... I haven't figured out why yet.... but it could be that it is black and white... my two fave colors to use!

Zoo

2010-02-17T20:55:00.008-06:00

Because Amy loves Leland and me she put our names on her Zoo membership so that we could come and enjoy the zoo free:D We usually go with Amy to the Zoo and we usually have a BLAST. Lately we have been taking Camden ( the one with the pigtails) along for the ride. Leland absolutely adores being out with his Amy and Eli... and he even seems to be warming up to Camden! Well anywho here are some pictures...

These are just some of the metal statues that they have around the zoo... we have yet to enter the children's zoo without stopping for the 3 yahoos to climb up...

This is Patrick... the silver back... the incredibly thoughtful silver back... yes he may be on the other side of the glass but when you get close enough to him to realize how BIG he is you kind of panic when he shifts his weight. A few times ago when they had the girl gorillas on this side of the exhibit they would run up to the windows and pound on them... we thought it was because of all the school kids that were tapping on the glass (which I don't think you are supposed to do) but this time around we were told by someone in their research center that they like the reaction we give when they do it... they think they are playing with us and not to be afraid... right I don't know if you have ever seen a 200-300 pound animal run at a window and start pounding but its scary! I put my hand up on the glass to see if he would look at it but pulled it away when he started to move. He held his hand out like he was examining it... or showing me what his looked like. It was a pretty neat experience... one that Amy and I enjoyed although the kids were ready do be done!

Amy went ahead and upgraded her membership so we could get unlimited carousel rides and monorail rides... its a pretty sweet deal and this last time we rode twice (which normally costs $12 dollars) for free... and the monorail for free... yes I know she paid when she upgraded but our next trip to the zoo should be pretty fun as it really will be for free... as we made sure it paid for itself last visit!

The three of them at the entrance to the children's zoo... every time we go they seem to get on the same ones so as not to mess up the order it works well as Camden is the oldest and Leland is the youngest!

Brian Leland and I got this cool new wagon from the Hamilton's for Christmas... and the three of them love it... which is only a probably because the 3 of them can't all fit at the same time. I love that it has cup holders... Yes I am a HUGE fan of cup holders!

More posing on metal statues... some of the kids were worried that they might be real... we assured them that they weren't and they seemed ok with them then but still nervous.

I think going to the Zoo is something our mom instilled in us as a blast because we love going. I miss the San Francisco Zoo though mainly because I really love the lemurs and they have tons of them while the Dallas Zoo only has like 4 or 5. Although we are getting a safari part of the zoo soon and they are going to have a lot more animals then... a whole pride of lions (which I asked about it and turns out to be some lion cubs... but I guess once its more than 3 you can call it a pride) So Mom you had better come visit once it opens so we can see if its any good!

Another fun fact... the elephants at the zoo are named Jenni and Gypsy. Amy and I like them because Jenni is Amy's age and Gypsy is mine... and every time we tell the kiddos that... its sort of amusing. While I think Amy's favorite are the turtles I think I like the otters the best or the Tiger.... or the tiny little monkeys... Ok I love them all:D

Shopping with Amy...

2010-02-17T20:50:00.001-06:00

I am a master packer of the cart... they don't look too squished do they? All it takes is a little chocolate to keep them still:D

Housewarming

2010-01-23T23:31:00.002-06:00

We however even with the last bummed out post had a lovely gathering today at our house. It was so fun to have everyone over and to just sit and chat it up. I am so grateful to have wonderful friends and family who would come to support on a rainy day! Thank you thank you thank you!

PS Hope and Phoebe thanks for going to dinner with me... and listening me dominate the conversation with all my mom crap:D I love you both TONS!

TMI?

2010-01-23T23:16:00.004-06:00

Ok so I know that most of you don't want to hear my sob story, and most of you have better sob stories but with that said I just need to put out there some feelings.... over the past four days I have convinced myself multiple times a day that I really could /could not be pregnant. Yes you read that right, I was 4/5 days late and I was sure that was a sign... Why isn't my body responding to the clomid like it used to? Why do I feel crazy? Yeah and it was in that moment that I felt totally broken and I dreaded talking to Brian, I didn't want to tell him I wasn't pregnant because I could see it written all over his face the excitement that it might actually be happening and I told him anyway cause how do you hid it when you are already a crying mess in the bathroom, and he just hugged me and told me we have time. And its so true we do, we have plenty of time, he is happy with what we have (even though he LOVES babies... this was news to him as he was never around them growing up) He will love me even if we have to adopt some day and that will be fine. (you know you always say you would adopt in a heart beat, but once you are struggling with infertility its like an emotional roller coaster... I am sure I will get there... )

I realized tonight though that I had more little tender mercies... I have a Lord who is aware of my hurts and my sadness when I have to go through these ups and downs.... I have someone to talk to through it and tell Him my fears and hopes and not be told "don't worry it will happen" or "you haven't even been through what other people have" He just knows that this is hard for me. He knows that every time I see a little baby my heart aches and He has given me friends to uplift and help me along this path. He has given me a sister who has been through it who gets the ups and downs, and I totally get now why she texted all of the heart wrenching tidbits, you have to share it with someone who loves you more than you sometimes realize. I have been given wonderful blessings and need to just be patient and I am sure I will receive more. And that is Dang hard my friends. It helps to have such a beautiful boy who constantly reminds me he loves me even when he decides to act like he may have spawned from somewhere else. I have a husband who supports me and lets me cry about nothing even if it makes him nervous. I am so lucky to have what I have. And to receive tender mercies like I had last week at church to re read my patriarical blessing and see the words your children multiple times. Sometimes its really hard to see the silver lining and sometimes its so simple... I hope that I can look for the silver lining more often... so that I can be the wife and mother I am supposed to be.

My Monkey!

2010-01-20T01:05:00.003-06:00

Here is my Leland in his natural habitat... He is a monkey I know that this isn't that high off the ground but this kid climbs on everything... and jumps on my couch... after he takes the cushions off...

He also apparently thinks I will go away if he closes his eyes.... This was taken just seconds after he smiled at me cocked his head to the side and said "Hi" that is what he does when he thinks he is in trouble and I have to admit its darling.

Sisters

2010-01-20T01:00:00.003-06:00

SO while my sister Annie was out for a visit we (me Annie, mom and Miranda) went to the famed Sam Moon... if any of ya'll have ever been to the metroplex I am sure someone you have met has RAVED about Sam Moon, I am not a total girly girl but I do enjoy purses and they have a TON of those so I generally go to peruse the purses. On this last trip we went to a different kind of Sam Moon (yeah they take on Luggage and it makes it a whole new store) and Annie found this gem.

If you can't read it, it says God made us sisters, Prozac made us friends. We both had a good laugh and then I said I would hang that in my house... so she bought it for me... I am going to hang it above my computer! Now I just need to get pictures of all of us sisters to put around it:D

Just a side note I don't think any of us are lucky enough to be on Prozac!

Best Christmas Gifts

2010-01-20T00:44:00.003-06:00

I think Amy and I often "rig" our Christmas drawings (we pick names otherwise it can get very pricey to buy for all of our family!) so that one of us gets Emily, she is SO crafty (so is Amy) and this year I got her! I LOVE what she made for me! I got homemade cards and a frame to go with a word board that she made me that says "I hope they call me on a mission" and the frame she made to go with it says Leland Valiant son of God. Which you can read clearly but yeah...

Anywho today I am thankful for such crafty sisters!

Who needs a Canvas

2010-01-20T00:39:00.005-06:00

I left Leland just diapered after bath today since we have had warmer weather and he likes to be nakie... although he did want his socks and slippers on.... but he somehow managed to get into a box I keep high on a shelf that has his "fun" markers you know the ones that don't need special paper to work:D Well he was so lovely I had to document it. I wish I had the one after he got it smeared onto his face but he broke my camera card reader so I will have to figure it out another day.

I adore this child more than anything. He always makes me laugh, and reminds me that life can be pretty darn sweet.

I found the cord to the camera so I could upload this one... Possibly my fave! He looks like a child of the 80's! And thats chocolate dribble... such a good mom!

Update on my Fertility... if this is too much for you just pass on by

2010-01-17T23:11:00.002-06:00

I have been on clomid for 4 months now. 3 of those months I have been on 100mgs that's 5 days of 100mgs. That a LOT of extra hormones. I have been feeling off lately these last few weeks especially. I do NOT like it... look at me using capitals... I usually try to avoid that cause it makes me a little crazy.... Anywho I have been forgetting things, and I haven't slept well and I just don't feel good. Now I have always believed that the Lord moves you to where you need to be and can move others to you that you need. I have been moved (technically 2 houses) close to a woman in my ward who has an alternative that worked for her when her and her husband had been trying for 5 years (that makes my 1 and 1/2 years look lame by the by) and today at church I stopped her after the block of meetings and asked her some questions. I would normally never shoot so straight on such a sensitive subject but I asked her when she was getting her adoptive son (its a cool story I am sure I will post on here later about it) and that launched the whole topic. She has gone to a chiropractor (who happens to be our bishop) / nutritionist. He has done wonders for how she has felt about life in general, not to mention the end result of a pregnancy and enough progesterone to keep the pregnancy. While I am not one for holistic medicine and in fact I have laughed at it plenty I think I may actually go meet with him and just see. Granted my insurance doesn't have him on the list but I may just try and talk with him and see if we can't work out some sort of deal. I really am not looking for an alternative I know that if I stayed on hormones I would be ok (possibly) and it could even result in a pregnancy but I look at the next four months and I kinda want to cry. Brian is going to school full time and working full time starting on Tuesday, its going to be a grueling schedule but one that he thinks he can tackle. That means all day Monday and almost all day Tuesday I won't see my husband. Yes I realize that so many women do it all the time, and some women don't see their husbands for much longer (which is why I stayed away from any kind of uniform mind you) but being hopped up on extra hormones I think will only add to the tension and stress that I am sure will be building around our schedule. SO I think I will give this a try. Clomid has been working bringing me closer and closer to a normal cycle, but at what price. Me feeling crazy and constantly wanting to cry. So I will keep y'all posted and hopefully I can soon be claiming the same thing... I have never felt better in my life, would be exciting words for me to utter after these last 4 months.

WWE

2010-01-16T11:53:00.003-06:00

You may want to turn the sound off. But its still pretty fun to hear Leland giggling even if his parents do sound a little lame. Leland has gotten into "tackling" Brian and Brian couldn't be more excited! He keeps talking about flag football at 4 and I keep telling him no. I am not into that. But if Leland wants to try it than sure, but probably not till 5 when he can articulate his wants better. Its pretty fun to watch this interaction. Brian really is tired most of the time because of school and work and the hard schedule that he keeps so when he wants to play Leland is THRILLED! Anywho I just wanted to share:D

Booties

2010-01-15T19:48:00.003-06:00

You may have noticed Leland's booties in the last post but I felt the need to tell you just how much he loves them. When I try to put on normal shoes there is protests... My mom knitted these up from a pattern my mother in law gave her... all I can say is we are going to need many more pair. He wore them outside today and got them completely nasty... I have hidden them until I can get them washed and he has already asked me in his words where the heck they are... he points at his feet then at mine that grandma Corinne made for me....

Really?

2010-01-14T23:44:00.003-06:00

I put on a new exercise video and I though I would give it a go with Leland up... for the first 20 minutes he sat like this....

Its a tae bo video so eventually the kicking started and he decided to abandon his post on the couch and try to catch my leg... so 30 minutes in I turned it off... I suppose it just counts that I did it a little. I also tried to do the elliptical with him up. When he was smaller he would WAIL when I got on it. I am not sure what he thought was happening but he wasn't happy about it. But he just kept trying to get on it or under it.... so 10 minutes in I got frustrated. You know most of the day he is content to be by himself exploring his toys or just trotting (this is his new thing and its adorable I will try to get it on video) around the house... only when I decide to make healthy decisions does he intervene.... interesting......

Learning by Example

2010-01-03T23:39:00.006-06:00

So I just have to post this because I think its darling. And it proves a very valid point that you never put too much thought to (well I never did) till this happened. I was getting Leland ready for a bath (he was having an allergic reaction to a puppy) and Brian came in to use the facilities. I had just striped the kid down to his birthday suit and was dosing him with Benedryl when I went to go get a towel while the bath was running. I came back to this.

Leland was just trying to be like his Daddy after observing him for a few moments. It made me smile and then wonder what else I needed to do differently with such little honest eyes watching!

I will post more about Christmas and New Years and the house in a bit, I still need to gather all the pictures as we had misplaced our camera in the mess.....

Just some thoughts

2009-12-15T23:15:00.003-06:00

We are still waiting to close on our house. Its been a super stressful week for me, and yet I know that the Lord is watching out for me. I know this because both my husband and child are still with us, and I love them to pieces. But I feel like I haven't updated in a LONG time so here goes.

Brian's surgery was a success! YAY! We didn't waste money. He still claims that his nose gets clogged up, but he is sleeping so much better, I know because he usually wakes me up when he doesn't (or maybe I am just so tired that I am not waking up.) Its still tender and healing but we are well on the way to recovery. He got an amazing blessing from my brother in law Mike, and again I am so thankful to be close to family. Its just not the same without them:D

Leland is doing great. He is so so handsome and for the first time the other day I realized he got my eyes not his dads his eyes are clearly green in this pic... whereas we thought they were blue looks like the Hazel gene won! He has been freaking out at night. I am still up because of it. It freaks me out to wake up to him screaming. I usually go in and sit and sing when it happens (cause they all say to let him stay in bed) but lately he is so shaken up I pick him up and just rock him and tell him I am here. I think the stress is affecting him but I am not sure we have had some major behavioral issues lately as well. So I think that is the safest guess. That and things are slowly getting packed up and I think that kids can sense when things are going to change and since most kids need a routine it freaks them out. 2 things I want to make sure I note are how much he loves looking at lights. We drove around for family night last night and he will yell from the back seat MAMA and then his gibberish. Its pretty dang darling! and 2 is that he has learned that Hi is a great greeting... and that it is also a "good" way to get out of trouble. It started when he had stripped in his crib, jammies diaper everything came off I walked in to get him and he knew I was ticked when he saw my face so he tilted his head and said HI I am glad to report that I am getting better at NOT giving into his darling Hi but it will be a while before I can ignore it.

Me well I am surviving.... like I said the house hasn't closed yet, its not for lack of funding the money is sitting at the title company its the fact that the title company didn't send all the documents and the bank (its a foreclosure) won't sign the papers without having everything in front of them. Tonight ended their 72 hours..... so hopefully it will close out tomorrow and we can start painting and getting things taken care of. Its super stressful to me as its hard for me to motivate when there is a possibility that this house is going to take longer than I am prepared for. Luckily we have lots of helpers so hopefully we will be able to get it done and move and it will all go smoothly. The house is still a disaster but we will make it I think. I have lots of help coming soon so that is good. I keep telling myself that.

I am increasingly thankful for the tender reminders that my first priority is my family, and I am grateful to have them... we got lucky with Leland and our fertility saga continues. SO we will put it in the Lords hands and hope there is another one for us some time. Its been an interesting process... I have been tested that is for sure. I am sure it also doesn't help to be pumped full of hormones while we are trying to move... eh survival is the key! Keep us in your prayers!

Guilty as charged

2009-12-06T23:28:00.004-06:00

I have been struggling to maintain my sanity these last few days. And with help from my wonderful in laws and my amazing sister I have managed to NOT lose it. However it still may happen and at which point I may not be able to recover;)

Brian had surgery this last Friday, and it was nerve racking for both of us, we teased back and forth about how smart it was of me to raise his life insurance this last month to 3 years worth of his salary. But when all was said and done, he is pretty priceless to me. They gave him a Valium once they called him back and he became super happy. Except when they did the IV she was an amazing stick, got it without having to try again and super quick! Brian begs to differ but I was watching so I know:D I sat out in the waiting room while he went under the knife and got to finish the last book of The Lord of the Rings series I have to say that I thoroughly enjoyed the book. The Doc came out and told me he was glad we went ahead with the surgery as his septum was SERIOUSLY crooked, I wish I could show you all how big his eyes got when he said that, but I digress, apparently the bone spur was what was causing the nose bleeds and the closed off sinus' was what was causing the mucus build up. So to get all of that fixed Brian should see a vast improvement. I only really started to get nervous a hour after that, since the Doc had come out at 9 to tell me all went well and that I should get to see him in about 30 minutes which turned into almost 2 hours. So I was ready to see him when they finally called me back. They told me turn left and left, so what did I do... turn right and go the the nurses station.... yeah I don't like NOT knowing what I am doing, so one of the nurses pointed me in the right direction and just told me to go find him. So in I went to a room filled with curtained off recovery spaces to find Brian. I passed two or three "rooms" when I found one that was sort of open, so I looked and it was some SUPER HAPPY guy... he smiled at me and asked if I was lost... I was sort of but I knew Brian had to be in there somewhere, and this guy wasn't going to be able to help me he had just had his ACL fixed or something like that. So I smiled and said just trying to find my recovering guy who happened to be right next to him, but he had and ice pack on his eyes so all I could see was his goatee.... I am glad I found the right guy though. He seemed to know I was there the minute I walked in and held out his hand. I find that he is a LOT more lovey dovey (like serious lovey dovey not his normal mocking crap) when he is on pain killers..... but anyway that was when I noticed that his feet were crossed... you can't really tell but they are and it made me smile cause Leland if sitting down ALWAYS has his feet crossed. I guess the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree.....

Anyway I found out that Leland had a fever and I wasn't supposed to expose my husband to anyone with a fever and so I flipped out for a bit and called Amy who was happy to take him even though she would risk her 5 boys getting sick. But luckily my lovely in laws kept him, not only did they keep him for all of Friday but also all of Saturday and into Sunday morning so I could get rest when Brian rested. I think they may have been a little bit sad to see him go home with us tonight. I however was so GLAD to have my bebob back. He changed so much in just those few days I couldn't stop looking at him. He is however totally irritated that his dad can't pick him up, he is pretty fond of his Dad and loves to spend time chilling with him.

Anywho I am extremely grateful to know that I have such wonderful family so close to help and listen when I feel like I am losing it completely. This week is going to be a rough go. But hopefully we will close on our house Monday or Tuesday and move by this weekend. Course we may try to move the weekend before Christmas if I can't get it all together!

Bah humbug...

2009-12-01T22:20:00.003-06:00

I am feeling a little bit like scrooge... although that could just be because I was told by my huz that it would be silly to decorate here since we are moving in a few weeks...... I may get some decorations out if I can get it clean tomorrow, but the lack of cheer in my home makes it hard to feel the season... dumb stress:D I am in desperate need of GOOD Christmas music.... wish I had the money to just down load it:D Hopefully soon we will be able to close and I will be able to decorate MY house, finally a house.... but its been extended again till the middle of next week... This is getting old... listen to me whine... at least we can afford a house and have that luxury so I guess I should just count my blessings! Well I also need some prayers folks Brian is going in for minor surgery on Friday, its outpatient so nothing huge... just getting his nose fixed up there are LOTS of things wrong poor guy. We think that might be why he is tired all the time, deviated septum bone spurs polyp's etc etc etc... it will be good to get it taken care of!

Quick story!

2009-11-23T12:40:00.002-06:00

Yesterday my FIL had Leland all day. He put him down for nap about the time the Cowboys game came on (yes that cracked me up) and went to check on him at half time. He opened the door just a crack and was staring at the crib, he couldn't see anything but he could hear some movement. So he opened the door a little wider. He found Leland on the queen bed right next to his crib with a bike helmet on and playing with toys Mimi had bought for Christmas. He told him to get back in his bed and stay there, and so he did. But we are pretty sure he didn't get any sleep. I think by 2 1/2 it will be impossible to keep him in the crib, although if there is nothing close to it he may not try to escape. I can only hope... :D

My Bebob....

2009-11-19T17:18:00.002-06:00

Ok so I know I am missing the post every day for something I am thankful for but today I am thankful for my little boy! He is amazing! His laugh can cure any bad days and I am just glad I have him to keep me company! Last night was a rough night, he was having a hard time breathing laying down (we were sharing a room at Amy's) and so I got him up and propped myself up with pillows so that if I held him he would be almost sitting up but still comfortable enough to sleep.... I was surprised by how much I didn't resent him for lost sleep (we all know how I NEED my sleep) instead I just cherished the fact that I had a baby that could sleep cuddled into my chest. Also last Sunday the youth choir preformed and he was sitting and playing and as soon as the boys joined in he turned around and grabbed the bench in front of him so he could listen to them. It tells much better in person... but yeah I am thankful for my bebob.

Blessed

2009-11-11T21:15:00.003-06:00

We are so blessed to have such great friends and our very supportive families close. I have two friends that are just wonderful and are always making sure I am taken care of when Brian is at school. Tonight I got the treat of being able to cook with them ( I LOVE to cook for groups.... I hate to cook for 2:D) and I feel a little bad cause I totally took over... but they let me be bossy and I came home (well they brought me home) feeling blessed that i have two adopted sisters down here in Dallas. I am also blessed to be so close to Amy who lets me crash her house when Brian needs to study(or any other time really:D)... She is the best ya'll Leland gets into everything and she just smiles and loves on him, it makes me feel so welcome and loved I just want her to know it. I adore her kids who always seem excited to see me, even if I am grumpy they are there with hugs... I hope they know how much I love them. Seriously some of the best kids around.

I am even more blessed because shortly I will be living so close to them I will be able to see them more, and hang out more, and get to be a part of their growing up. I am hoping I can be a good example to those kids and let them know I love them even when I am hard on them... Poor Zeke probably gets it the worst, but its just cause I love him too darn much... Talk about a ray of sunshine... Zeke is that!

I am also finding myself very grateful for my wonderful in laws, who love me regardless of how messy my house is or how whiny I am. They are great and I am thankful for all they do for us. They have been very supportive and helpful with this whole home buying business and I love that. I feel like I can call them up and ask questions and they will spend whatever time they have answering them.

So as Thanksgiving approaches I just wanted to be thankful a little in advance for the wonderful family that I have surrounding me. Even the ones that are far away and i miss daily... I love them all and am grateful for the support and love we get from them!

Our House!

2009-11-09T11:43:00.010-06:00

Our House inspection went so WELL! We only have some minor things to fix and they are totally doable by ourselves! WHICH IS AWESOME... and by ourselves I do mean with the help of my Father in law:D But we are so excited there is a radiant barrier in our attic and while it is not a weight bearing attic (meaning we can maybe store one or two light things, we can't store much up there) that will significantly help in reducing the cooling bill or so we were told. Our garage also has some insulation on the actual garage door... but that is probably because there are windows into the garage. Almost every window has blinds already on it, except of course in the garage and in the kitchen, so we only need to buy a few of those which will be really nice! The Hamilton's gave us $100 dollar gift card to Home Depot for our anniversary, so we will be buying some of our stuff there! Thanks Mom and Dad Hamilton for the gift! Anyway we used an inspector named Ted Menelly, he was wonderfully helpful and took us through how to fix each thing that he found was wrong with the house. He let us ask him a million questions and was more than happy to to walk us through how to fix it more than once. He is on the cheaper end of the spectrum but in no way would you know it. He is helpful and very much a good sport. He finished telling us all about our homes issues then waited patiently while Brian went around and got all the pictures for ya'll. We had a nice conversation..... while we were waiting for him to finish up and I would highly recommend him if you need an inspection done any time soon!

Before you scroll through the pictures you should know we bought a foreclosure... which is why there is all sorts of random and its NOT clean....

This is our side yard

Me looking large in front of the garage

Front of our house

The lovely owner also installed the garage door opener wrong... and they tore it half way down when they left.... I suppose it could have been worse....
Our closet runs the whole back side of our room... ITS HUGE!

Our lamely stunted bathroom vanity, we will eventually put some new cabinets in and extend the vanity but for now its perfect.

Our tub... YAY

Master bedroom the door on the back wall is the closet, and the door on the side wall is the master bathroom

these are the lovely parting holes the last owners did. Should be easy to fix, I hear they have classes at Home Depot and Lowes for this sort of thing... Looks like I will be learning some new things!
Back side of the house

This is our backyard... from the patio (one of the problems is it is sloped towards the house so we will have to make a drainage way for it so we don't end up with all our soil washed up to the house)

My incredibly small pantry (but on the flip side I have more cabinets than I ever had before... so we can make it work!

This is our kitchen (to those I talked to and said it had a fridge I very much got the two houses we saw that day mixed up... we are getting a fridge from the Hamilton's... its a lovely :D I am just thankful we don't have to buy one! Mom H if this information comes as a shock to you talk to Brian he is the one that told me we were getting the fridge from your garage:D)

This is the closet of the bedroom Leland will be in,... Just have to get some new hinges...

Guest bathroom/ Leland's bathroom yes that is some random t shirt just hangin out there

This is the sink for the above bathroom, Brian must have found it amusing that they left the soap...

This is our living room going into the kitchen

the walk way me and our inspector are standing by leads into the master bedroom

This is supposed to be a formal dinning room, but Brian and I are going to use it as a computer space.... and if we keep our fish tank it will go in here probably.

The two doors that are straight to the back are the two bedrooms, the door off to the left is the laundry room which leads off to the garage and the door on the right is the bathroom....
Laundry room

Spare bedroom....

Spare bedroom closet... if we can ever afford "dish network" we have a box for it...

Let me know what ya think.... We are super excited about it, and we are less the 10 minutes from my sister Amy, and with that said we will be in her ward for a little while as I suspect they will be splitting her ward sooner rather than later! I am SO SO thankful for your prayers and thoughts cause we got an amazing deal. This house new sells for 146,000 and we got ours for 120,000 and with minimal problems to fix that is a HUGE blessing!

Fun Frames!

2009-10-26T23:03:00.003-05:00

My friend Kamille, who I went and visited this weekend makes these fabulous frames.... I got this one when Leland was born, and I have to admit she knows me well! I LOVE LOVE LOVE Green! It is just so fun to have on our wall... The other nice thing is it fits both a 5x7 and 4x6, and it looks fabulous either way! You can check our her Etsy shop House to Home Frames. She will do custom orders as well! Check it out... you may just find something you love to pieces!

Sailing

2009-10-26T23:00:00.003-05:00

Brian Jr. and Brian Sr. went out sailing a few weekends ago, Leland was a natural on the boat and got his sea legs after a few minutes. I hear it was a great time had by all! I am glad Poppy is so willing to share the boat with us! It is a fabulous time!

I have a BLOG?

2009-10-26T21:42:00.005-05:00

I haven't blogged in forever and I admit I feel guilty about it... wanna know what else I feel guilty about? I haven't decorated for Halloween, and I won't either... cause yeah... I am lame I suppose but really its just more stuff to store and our storage closet is overflowing! I figure the easiest way to do this is to # them... so here goes...in no particular order!

1. The parents came at the beginning of October, this is also Amy's birthday we went to Texas Road House for her birthday dinner and she was a great sport and rode the fake horse:D But I think the best part was when her oldest boys asked her to PLEASE make sure she read the cards... don't forget the cards mom! And when she did the first one said, "I hope you like the shirts and the chocolate" Ame and the rest of us got a good laugh, and had fun explaining to them that a card should NOT tell the person what is in the bag...

We played lots of Mario Kart... by we I do mean pops and the kiddos, Amy is a pro so she enjoyed playing as well, i like to watch as I normally make noises that are not kosher with sleeping children... Although I do make it more fun:D Leland was itchin to get his little hands on one so Pops took him on and played a few races "with his help" you can tell he is pretty focused...

and then you can see that sliver of his dad he inherited... wait... what squirrel?

Amy and my mom discovered this great sale at JC Penny's when they went out to the mall and I stayed home with most of the kids, I had Brian and my dad to help, both of whom were hard to find but I digress... Amy came back with this cute little outfit for Leland since I stayed home with the kiddos.

As always when Gram and Gramps come there was a lot of laughter and fun to be had. Brian and I shared the joys of spinner with my parents and I think it is safe to say they enjoyed it. Well at least I hope they did as they kept asking to play it! Amy seemed to enjoy it as well, except for when she was sitting between Brian and Dad. I am always glad when they come to visit as it is always fun and shakes up the day to day around here.

Ps I have NO IDEA why it is all the sudden blue and underlined... not a single clue! Jen if you are reading this and can fix it you would be my hero!

2. My TMI... so skip this one if you don't want to know.... I started my own period this time around. I was late 8 days and got the joys of getting tested twice for pregnancy both were negative and I think you have to be female to understand what that means happened to my emotions. Even if you don't want to be pregnant there is always a little disappointment when you aren't or at least there is for me and some of my friends/sisters. There is always a let down for me, so even though I was sure I wasn't pregnant is was still super hard to see the negatives. Poor Brian we bought our tests at Costco (since my doc said we could test at home to save some money) and another sup was checking us out and he kept saying you don't need these, and see I told you you would have another one... although Broc has five so that may be why he enjoys teasing other people so much. Anyway I go in tomorrow for a test, I am not sure what the test is called only I know that it will be for determining how much of a certain hormone I will be getting as the last dose didn't have any effect. We are moving forward and I am still amazed by my sisters strength as she has dealt with it for MUCH MUCH longer than I have, it is so nice to have someone to call when the questions seem dumb or if I have asked them and still need clarification. So that is that in that department....

3. Some fun pictures

I don't know if you can see it but the helmet says age 14+ and it fits him perfectly, it makes me laugh every time I see it! Sorry about the chocolate on the chin... but I don't have photo shop so it gets to say in the picture!

He has taken to "sucking" on two binkies at once, which I find adorable... However it may be all the more shock when they have to be thrown away and I am not buying anymore cause he bite though the silicone and that is just a waste of money!

He also likes to wear my fuzzy socks... its pretty awesome....

4. Leland is in his terrible 2's no doubt about it. In the last few weeks I have had some seriously bad days... the first day starts out with his shower, I left him to go get a towel and he climbed out and shut the door which then magically locked itself, with him in the bathroom and me in the hallway. While I was frantically looking for a bobby pin or a hair clip to be my key into him, I can hear water hitting the floor and my toes are getting wet... once in the bathroom I realize he has stepped in his diaper that I had taken off earlier and smeared pooh all over my flooded bathroom, so I put him back in the tub, clean his feet and hands, and go to clean the mess up so germs are carried everywhere in the house. This time I have given him the shower head ( I know could I have done anything more stupid, but it was the only way to keep him in the tub... and I told him he would get a swat if he pointed it out of the tub...) and run to start the laundry real quick cause I don't know many people who want to put poopy towels into their laundry basket. And I come back to... you guessed it another flooded bath tub, SO I pulled him out and he got his promised swat... I brought him out screaming and I diapered him, and went to clean the mess up AGAIN (although this time sans pooh) and I came back to follow the pooh balls to him in my LAUNDRY CLOSET, which i had shut and it has one of those cursed baby proof doorknobs on it, and he has it OPEN and is pouring out my laundry detergent onto the carpet... man I wish I used powder but no its the liquid kind... so I am torn clean up the pooh or clean up the laundry detergent which he is now sitting in squeezing though his fingers... the pooh won out and it was a quick clean ( I LOVE SPOT SHOT) and the laundry mess was horrible to clean up. I must have used 4 or 5 big towels to try and get it all up, and man our carpet is super soft over there! The other day follows more of the same line, only with cereal dumping and milk spitting instead of the water, pooh and detergent... so really we have some LONG LONG days here in the Hamilton household......

5. Amy's darling kids.... Amy's kids are DARLING! Little Eli had the flu this last week, and is still trying to recover, and on the day he had his fever and was diagnosed he was sure he would feel better at my house, and I would have loved to have him, except he had the flu... poor baby! He is sure sweet... and Zeke with his Comber story... its a good one... I will write it another day, or you can call and ask me about it.... They continually make me grateful I live so close to them. And of course there is Amy, she is amazing all by herself!

6. House Hunting.... Yes we started looking for houses, it has been interesting to say the least and there has been a LOT of stress for me. We would ideally like to find the perfect house and close before the end of November so we could get the tax credit since Texas really doesn't have perks for first time home buyers but I don't know if we will be able to. I will keep ya'll posted though. we look at one more house tomorrow. Should be fun!

7. WoW... World of Warcraft... I am giving it up... the definite end date...April 2010... thats really just because we have paid in advance for our accounts. It is interfering with my daily life, and it is just no good... I think its better this way. I seem to have an addictive personality... and no I am afraid that I won't be giving up caffeine any time soon... but perhaps I will get the hang of this giving up thing and we will see a uncaffeinated me sooner rather than later....

8. Our anniversary is coming up, I wanted to do something really fun and special but if we are buying a house... we will probably just save our monies... eh happy 3rd babe...

New Jammies....

2009-09-24T11:42:00.003-05:00

Well to us at least, these awesome Jammies came from Amy's and she thinks they may have just made their way through all of her kids well at least though Caleb... I think they are darling!

This is cute....

2009-09-24T11:32:00.001-05:00

My mom thinks this ad is cute because the end face is just like my kids... it cracks me up...and truthfully I cannot figure out how to make this work... so here is the link....

Ally Bank Ad

TMI warning....

2009-09-23T23:37:00.003-05:00

I started my hormones the other night... So I have only been on them for 2 days... and I hate it. My head aches and my chest is killing me... its the not so dull ache you get when you get engorged. People I am not doing well with this. Thankfully I have only dry heaved once.... I will make it though 5 days of hormones.... I think I can I think I can.... With that said I don't know if I will last I have been an emotional mess for the last few days.... again I think I can I think I can. I think I really need to go clean.... But folks I thought I would let you know that we are moving ahead.... and we can all hope there will be an addition in our family soonish... cause you know they take 9 months to make:D

Cousin Jared....

2009-09-21T23:04:00.002-05:00

So my cousin Jared is in a band called South for the summer... and apparently it is important that they get some listens on this website I think I linked it directly to the weekly charts... so you just click to play his bands music... Its pretty fabulous, well I enjoy it, and I have an eclectic taste in music, I like a little bit of everything... Although I also liked/loved his band from high school called Training for Yesterday... I loved the name, and I loved the music... Anywho his dad my Uncle Jeff was a fabulous musician and all his kids have some skills in that area... if you are interested check it out....

Party #2

2009-09-14T22:05:00.002-05:00

We went up to the Green's tonight for party number 2. It was so much fun, and I must say Mom Green is much more organized about parties than I think I will ever be! She always has balloons, and table cloths and matching plates and napkins and party blowers and yummy snacks around. So we hung out and Leland got to run away from Dottie most of the night, but I remember when they first got Dottie and she dwarfed my baby, now he is bigger than her. Its amazing how big he has gotten.

We played Risk with Brian which is never fun, its endless chit chat about logically I would do this and logically that was the dumbest move you could have made etc etc etc. Well Jason ( I know it was super nice to see him as sometimes I think he forgets we exist) managed to take Brian out pretty early in the game, which was nice, but then Brian had plenty of time to help everyone, and when I took some more of his pieces off the board he told me I was dumb for doing that, I should have weakened Jason, which I would have done had Brian said I would never win against him... No I am not competitive I don't know what you mean:D Anyway he eventually rubbed Jason so much the wrong way that Jason just quit, probably because Mom was going to wipe him out with her next turn but whatever. She won the game, so that was fun. The girls came too so that was nice, we got to see Emily and Caitlin and we really never get to see them so it was nice to get to catch up. Caitlin is pretty amazing at track and field, high jump is her speciality. She won at nationals and she is going to train for the Olympics at least that is her goal. She is pretty amazing at it, and we are proud of her, but she and Emily play sports year round, right now they are in Volleyball and Caitlin a few weeks back dislocated her thumb so we talked about that a little tonight.

Anywho Leland is one spoiled kid, he got a new fire truck that makes noise (yay.....) and a really cool wooden puzzle that doubles as a book, and my personal fave is the growth chart which is Dr. Seuss I love it! And he got some clothes and there was something else but I just can't think of it tonight. Sadly I forgot our camera at home, so I will have to get them from Libby, she took lots of pictures, so I will post some later.

We sure are blessed to have such loving families, it has been a super fun weekend.

Party #1

2009-09-14T21:57:00.004-05:00

We had a great tiny gathering on Sat with lots of fun and real excitement.

Leland got a bike from Mimi and Poppy...

Hats from Rachael...

And got a pull string pinata from Mom and Dad, that he couldn't understand why we wouldn't let him pull ALL of the strings at once.

Hopie got him bath crayons and bath finger paint. Amy and family got him a view finder and refills, as well as a target gift card. The Shondells got him a Thomas the tank engine movie, as well as a Jetsons movie, their mom Leland's adopted grandma made this fabulous cake!

and mom and dad got him an easel and chalk from Ikea. Sadly we missed taking pictures during opening the presents, however Leland was more excited about his bike than anything and couldn't be pulled away. His cousins taught him how to honk the horn and everything... thanks Amy I am sure I will find a way to repay that kindness! I kid I kid......

He also got to try and blow out the candles I think his dad may have helped... bum....

Happy Birthday Bebob!

2009-09-13T21:49:00.010-05:00

My kiddo turns 2 today.... Its been a wonderful 2 years full of struggles....I mean happiness and joy:D This little guy is turning into quite the character and we are so lucky that we get to have him here with us and for eternity. Brian and I marvel at how fast he has grown up and how much spunk the kid has. Brian likes to remind me that he is JUST like his mom. We are truly blessed to have such a fun kid and I look forward to many years more with my little man. I sure love him with all my heart. Even when he disappears with a pack of gum....:D

Ta da....

2009-09-11T20:14:00.004-05:00

It is finished, in the nick of time! Now I just have to clean up all the tools and paint out of the kitchen so I can mop and get the house together for Leland's little gathering tomorrow! We are way excited to see what people say about it! There is one picture where it looks super orangish but its not really that orange its just the flash, its a deep red. I think I am in love with it. Such a happy color, and just enough to be perfect. The silver knobs all had black paint on them and I spray painted the hardware silver.... I think it turned out pretty darn good... but thats just me:D

Seriously!

2009-09-10T00:15:00.002-05:00

Ok... so I added this friend on facebook that knows some of my friends in California which means I don't really know him..... He used a word that was offensive to me and had used this said word before on multiple occasions. I thought I would call him on it, mainly because I had been called on using the word "retarded" and I am trying to cut it out of my vocab now. I don't like to offend people if I can help it thats all there is to it. I hear I can be somewhat abrasive or something like that. Anyway his response is that I was ridiculous because I was offended by a word, and he was not using it in good fun... oh well thanks for the clarification you are just a huge jerk.... unfriend.... but now I am still angry and frustrated and I hate that feeling, I let myself feel that way. Ugh.... SO frustrating... on a side note my friend Amanda came over and she helped me paint. So all thats left now is to clean off my hardware a little better ( I stripped it tonight...) let it dry out and then spray paint it. Then I can put my kitchen back together. I will post pictures tomorrow, it should be done before Brian gets home so I can put him to work on the cleaning of the apartment.

P.S.

2009-09-08T21:40:00.004-05:00

My Poor son was ignored all of today so I could get this project done.

He is wearing a diaper I swear it just doesn't look like it cause he is covering it up with his hands. I Think he watched Shrek 3 a total of 4 times... He LOVED it... I however felt like a horrible mom......

Okay so I know they are both basically the same picture... But notice his mouth in this one... This is how his dad watches TV:D

My Ridiculous Project...

2009-09-08T21:21:00.003-05:00

This is my ridiculous project as Brian told me tonight, as I was slaving away in the kitchen trying so hard to get the cabinet doors off so I could get ready to paint tomorrow with help from my lovely friend Amanda, and yet there are still some issues with the kitchen. Anyway I had asked him to come wipe off the fronts of the doors so I could just hop right in and paint tomorrow. I get why he thinks its ridiculous I really do, but at the same time I feel totally unsupported. This isn't our home, we probably won't be here past Feb 2011 (wow just writing that is weird) since we will hopefully be able to afford a house, and two years to Brian is so something he can live with. Well of course it is for him, he gets out of the house a LOT more than I do. I HATE the kitchen right now and since they paid for the supplies, I figure it is a worthwhile project, I get to try out red cabinets and if it turns out that I hate them I can just deal for 2 years and not stress.... cause its not my house! So some of the many problems I have come up against are mainly due to the fact that I didn't want to just paint over the hinges like the last 3 or 4 paint jobs so that created a huge problem, with stripping the screws.... not so much fun!

See the above picture to understand just how painted over these suckers are, I have removed some of the screws in that picture too and it was a beast!

This is the LAST hinge that is up minus the naughty little cabinet door later in the post. You can also see how bad the paint jobs have been here... SERIOUSLY so frustrating!
These are all the cabinet doors... minus the above mentioned door..... Can't wait to start painting them!
This is all the hardware that needs to be stripped of the old paint and then spray painted to match. The black is on the knobs from the doors, and the white/copper are the hinges, this I think is going to be even worse than getting them off the walls... Paint stripper is seriously strong smelling stuff.... I think I may look at Home Depot for something with less of a smell, since it is still in the high 80's here and we all know how well I function when I am hot. I wouldn't mind if it was just me in the house smelling the fumes but poor Leland is a little too young to lose all those brain cells....

lastly this is my naughty little door that doesn't want to come down. I think I am going to have to buy some drill bits and drill off the heads like suggested by Tamera, then pull it off the wall, then unscrew the hinges using the pliers. I will seriously be so thankful when this job is done regardless of how it turns out. It will be DONE and that is all that matters at this point!

Long Day

2009-08-30T22:35:00.002-05:00

Today my friends was long... but just because of 3 little events...

1. Leland choked on a cookie as his little face was turning red I panicked and pounded his back... which lead to vomit all over my carpet and leg, and some pooh balls that got flung (it was during a diaper change) but my baby was breathing so we moved on with life.

2. He almost fell in the pool at the Hamilton's, and we were all out there watching so why this affected me so much we may never know. He was squatting over the edge trying to get the chlorine holder out and as he toppled forward I said "he's goin in" but thankfully he just fell flat on the concrete (nothing was hurt, but his feel goods) I may have been a little upset with him, and reprimanded him a little hard. I now know what it feels like for those mom's who watch their kids almost get hit by a car, and instead of saying something like "oh thank heavens you are safe" say something like "what the heck were you thinking" and then squeezing the living day lights out of the poor kid. Thankfully he has a Poppy who has a quick reaction time as well, he was up as fast as me if not faster, as his chair actually fell over. I don't think they have ever seen me move that fast:D

3. I think the kiddo had an allergic reaction to my sister in laws dog, not that I am too worried, I gave him some allergy meds and stayed up a bit so I could check on him before I went to bed ( I also showered him off and washed his face and hands and hair)

All I have to say is I am READY for some rest, lets hope Leland sleeps in tomorrow!

2009-08-29T22:47:00.002-05:00

How fun is this, although it would have to have a seat belt in the bin, cause Leland is a climber:D Anyway if click on the link above I can win one:D LOL I never win anything, but hey its worth a try!

Busy Lazy Days

2009-08-26T20:58:00.005-05:00

Is this not the cutest thing you have seen all day... my heart literally jumps when I see this picture... I love the concentration!

Linus shirt I found at Target, its a 4t and he is oh going to be 2 in two weeks... its perfect because Brian and I have taken to calling him Linus:D

Ladies since Brian has started this new work schedule I have been less likely to be at home on his day off, and really he has been amazing. Within the last week or so he has really shown me a different side of himself. Which is amazing because these last few weeks have been Topsy turvey. We have had stress with school and some family stress, and the news which my sister Annie and I have long since suspected that I have PCOS (poly cystic ovary syndrom) SO it has been a little overwhelming, but not bad since we have been able to see a silver lining and all the family stuff worked out!

Brian and I haven't really spent a whole lot of time together, I have been busy helping Hope move to Denton to start grad school and when I am not doing that he is at work. So tonight we decided to get some time together and so we stayed in tonight and watched the last of the Pirates movies (which didn't used to play on our old DVD player) and enjoyed a papa john's pizza, I only include the food because we ordered a large and we ATE THE WHOLE THING:D Also this is the pizza we were eating over 2 years ago when I decided to take the pregnancy test to see if I was just being overly emotional or in fact pregnant. And the same pizza which Brian began throwing up when I told him it was positive... poor guy, married at 20 and baby by 21 must have been stressful! It made me laugh and I almost said something to him tonight about the memory... but I remembered just how touchy his stomach is and because he ate most of the pizza I decided I had better not remind him of that just yet! Leland ate 4 crusts (he HATES cheese... so weird) and we enjoyed the movie... yes I let him watch bits and pieces of the movie... he more played with me more than watched. Anyway I had to blog this whole long story because we paused it half way through to do bed time (and Leland has all the sudden decided that he does not need naps... uhmmm that's really not going to work for me but I digress) so at 7 we had prayers and I sang his two songs and I blew him kisses and he stood up and started whacking me I said nope we don't hit we hug, I know you are frustrated but you need to get some sleep because tomorrow we get to see Eli and Aunt Amy, he then pulled me in real tight... and then giggled, laid down and closed his eyes... I think someone has been missing his buddy Eli! So I am thankful the flu has passed from their house so we can go and play!

Brian has been super supportive of me, even when I made some pretty stupid mistakes, and lost control of myself. He reminded me how grateful I am to have a man who holds the priesthood. Which made me forever grateful to my sister Amy and her family for being the example I refused to be. Sorry this post really has no flow but all these things are in my head, and I am just trying to get them written down before I forget them or lose site of them.

And over the last few days I have become aware that things could be so much worse than what I have happening in my life. A friend who I have never actually met (I found her through blogs and Jen:D) faces some hard medical tests and her friend faces some even harder facts with grace that I would not be able to muster I am sure if I were in her position. Jules wrote her words and linked over to her friends page from her blog but I will include the link for her blog as well entitled Bucket list . These two women are amazing to me. I am glad to have stumbled across Jules and from there to have been introduced to Allie's blog. I hope that neither of them mind me sharing their blogs, and I hope that if you do read their blogs you will offer a prayer on their behalf, be forewarned that they are crying blogs, I sat and blubbered my way through them.

Other than that nothing else is really new with us. Leland is growing by leaps and bounds, I can't believe how different he looks from just a few months ago... I was going to try posting side by side here, but it won't let me perhaps another day....

Dang Cute....

2009-08-16T16:58:00.002-05:00

I was reading a friends blog and she said that sometimes we don't post about the little things and it made me laugh cause I don't post unless it seems super important. But over the last week we've been pretty busy....

Our car got broken into. They took our stereo and smashed our window... But it was the small window so it wasn't too bad to replace.

Leland was horrible, then swatting at me while saying prayers I told him we don't hit, and his response was to pull me in close and give me super Leland hugs.

We went to the Zoo and I got heat stroke, or so I am told, which is why I felt like retching and the shakes and the horrible headache.

Brian got a promotion, he is now Gas Station Supervisor. This means he goes to work at 4:30 a.m. and gets home by 1:30 p.m. its Fabulous!

Went to Atlas Auto Body to fix the window and they were wonderful, they remembered everything about me, including that I owe them a piece of wedding cake... Brian and I are going on 3 years so these men have a GREAT memory.

I saw Phoebe for some girl time.

Had my Mother in Law over for a day.... and learned how to play Rummy.

And all this has helped me realize how truly blessed I am...

Holy Crow

2009-08-06T20:58:00.002-05:00

So I am overly emotional right, and thats due to my crazy hormones that have decided they are done being normally abnormal... but it seems to make everything ten times harder. So I had an okay day, I mean I was stuck at home and in an effort to reduce our electric bill I turned the air up so before it kicks in it gets to 78 degrees which may not sound hot but people I am not a skinny mini! SO this afternoon I decided it was over due to get in the kitchen and do the dishes, as I was getting it done, I managed to clog the sink with a box of cooked mac and cheese that never got eaten... I decided I would wait until Leland went down tonight to get it taken care of which is a BAD idea when you live on the first floor of an apartment. I noticed the water going up and was a little nervous but ignored it thinkin it was my imagination... Then when I went to drain the water out of the U pipe I noticed that the sinks were almost full so in a panic I got as many bins under the sink as I could and just started loosening the joints and then I heard it... my upstairs neighbor turned on their garbage disposal... and the sink started bubbling.... and then overflowing a little bit, and ya know what... I threw down some towels and ran up stairs in my PJ'S and asked them to PLEASE stop using their sink while I get mine taken care of... she seemed to understand but then she wanted to chat about it... REALLY! I have a huge mess at home! I need to get home and clean it.... So its been a heck of a night.... just thought I would share!

Note to self....

2009-08-02T12:02:00.004-05:00

Do not drift into a peaceful nap while watching a movie with your almost 2 year old son...

You will wake up with this....

and my friends that is highlighter and permanent marker... and my LEG... yeah you would think I would learn......

We have been having sleep overs and the latest one was with Zeke... We had just finished a bag of popcorn and he was asking me for more he said "al if you pop another bag of popcorn I will most likely be eating it." Cracked me up... Instead of another bag of popcorn I poured some peanut M&M's into his bowl but way too many came out so I told him we would share and he was disappointed to say the least, as the bowl got emptier and emptier, he took two huge handfuls out, and told me I could pick a few more... He is a cute kid!

This is Leland watching a movie with Zeke before his nap time, Zeke is on the couch but Leland opted to be closer to the TV. The suitcase in the back ground is one my mom gave us, and Leland likes to pull/push it around... I always find treasures in it:D

We are doing pretty dang good. Brian is still working hard at work, and waiting to hear back on a few positions he put in for at work, we wouldn't mind your prayers on that one! Work has been super stressful for him lately, but he plugs away and tries to stay positive. He starts back to school here in a bit, with the light at the end of the tunnel, he will graduate in December of 2010. I couldn't be more excited because that means we will get to start looking for a house, which means we will probably look in Amy's neighborhood and around the Hamiltons neighborhood... It will be super nice to move a little closer to family! I am doing the same old same old, so nothing new to report here! Wow this turned into an update blog, but I don't do those often so there ya have it!

PS I am looking to start obtaining good children's chapter books... I have tried picking up some of the ones that have won awards, and some of them really aren't books I would want to read out loud to Leland... Yes I realize he won't sit through them yet, but I want to start a collection before that time happens! I expect to hear from Alison and Amy I am sure you two have tons to recommend:D

YAY!

2009-07-31T09:38:00.001-05:00

For those of you that actually read the TMI posts, I have started! YAY for me! Anywho just thought I would update for everyone who was biting their nails!

Horrible No Good Day

2009-07-19T14:17:00.002-05:00

You know some days are just destined to be bad... and people I had one of those days on Friday.... SO first of all, I was trying to fix our door handle on our front door, only to discover it was broken AND I had a sweet neighbor come to check on us to make sure we were all right, apparently apartment 132 had had an attempted break in and they wanted to make sure we were all right, I assured him that we were and told him I couldn't figure out this dang door knob and he went home to put his dog inside and came back with a screw driver, he tried to help but alas we discovered that it really was broken so I decided to head off to Home Depot.
Now before I go into that I need to catch ya'll up, Lauren (Hope's sister) had offered me a very part time job at the fitness spa she works at down town, and because I could take Leland with me I took it, it sounded like a super deal and it was however Friday morning I woke up with this doom and gloom feeling.... Anyway Lauren had called Thursday evening and asked me to come in at 1 which was an hour earlier and I said I would be able to do that, Leland normally goes down for a nap when we have plans in the afternoon at 10 and sleeps for a bit, so this door knob business was cutting into nap time and I started to get even MORE nervous about this job.
SO like I said I was off to Home Depot, and when I got there I threw my keys in the diaper bag, got out of the car shut my door, and went to get Leland out... ONE PROBLEM, all of the doors were locked and I left my diaper bag inside... I panicked had no clue what to do, so I asked a lady in the parking lot if she had a pen I could borrow, because I thought ok call a locksmith type thing, well she asked a Home Depot employee what we should do and he came running over and said we call 911 and before I had my phone out Ron was on his phone with a 911 operator. Leland was playing with Ron the whole time he was on the phone, and this is when I LOST it, I just started balling, and I couldn't stop, what kind of mother locks her baby in the car???? So the fire engine came and the ambulance came and they got Leland out after being in there for like 25 minutes, and he passed the EMT's inspection although he didn't want to come to me, he thought those fire fighters were pretty cool at this point Vince (another Home Depot employee) had brought us out a water bottle and was making sure I was ok and that they had gotten Leland out of the car. To make the whole situation more stressful though a woman who had all her kids parked and let them get out to see the fire truck, or possibly to see what was going on. But it seriously stressed an already stressed me out.... And we still hadn't gotten our door knob so I still had to go inside and get that, and I got lucky because Vince helped me find the aisle and who was in the aisle but Ron and he helped me pick out a door knob that was not too expensive and that would fit our door. I had called Hope at this point to ask her to call Lauren and tell her that I wasn't going to be in since i was having such a bad day, and Lauren texted for me to call her, so I did and she said go home have a rest and then come in, and I tried to explain to her that I was at my limit, I didn't think I could handle training, I can't even talk to anyone without tearing up.
At this point I remembered that we needed milk so I went over to Costco, got milk and waiting for Brian to go on Break, I recounted it to Brian and he of course was like well the Home Depot and Costco are so close you could have just called my work and I would have booked it over there to open the door, and I was like DUH that would have been the easiest and best option but I WAS PANICKED not thinking as clearly as I should have been.... just a thought there. So I got a text right before I was leaving Costco and it was Lauren asking me if I wanted the easy out, and if I didn't think the job was going to work. To which I thought, no I really don't think it is, I have to drive downtown twice a week for 3-4 hours each shift, I honestly don't know if it is worth it. I will have to keep looking and i told her thanks for thinking of me, and now I just hope she isn't upset with me. So we got home and I decided that Leland and I would nap together on my bed ( I mean I am still feeling terrible about locking him in the car, so naturally I want to be REALLY really nice to him) and I go to change his diaper, which had pooh in it, I get him all cleaned up and he chucks the clean diaper across the room, I go to get it and when I return there are little rabbit poops ALL over... SO he got to sleep in his crib.... Oh and while the Home Depot guy Ron was on the phone with 911 he broke the door handle off of the back passenger side door. I am however lucky enough to have found a replacement part that only cost 30$ and I hope my friend James will be able to replace it for us, I will of course pay him for his time... but that was my most horrible no good day thus far friends.... I am thankful it is over...