Nerves

My little is experiencing the nerves of knowing something is coming... something big. I have been watching him over the last few weeks and have been amazed at his ability to try and process these things. For example, when Brian or I talk to him about the new baby he seems to be happy, if not a little bit nervous but in general ok with it. When other people talk to him about it he gets fidgety and often leaves the conversation. I don't know that he is quite ready to admit that we are getting a new baby. Among other things he has become overly clingy and has recently rediscovered his bear which has not left his sight the last few days. That was his lovey from a while ago, and for like 6 months he could have cared less where that sucker was. I guess I just worry about him and his reaction. He is what I would like to call my gentle giant, he is somewhat soft with those that are smaller than him and has recently taken a liking in his friends new brother. I just hope I do it right for him, meaning I do the transition right, I don't over baby him or under baby him and that he know without a shadow of a doubt that he will always be my baby. I will just have two of them now instead of one. and I want him to know that I will love him always and forever no matter what.

A few things recently that caught my attention when chatting with him.... Last Sunday the 17th we were talking, he was feverish and just laying on my lap and I was asking if I could get my baby anything. With that he sat up and looked at me and said I'm not the baby (pointing to my belly) that is, I am your boy Mom.

And tonight after a cranky Dad got home from work ( I would SO be cranky too after standing out in the heat all day... especially when at 9 am it was already 92 degrees) and had told Leland to get in bed and stay there I had gone to check on him. I walked in and asked if he was ok or needed anything and he just looked at me with sad eyes and said... "Daddy is ANGRY!" poor kid. I explained that Dad was just tired from work and would have had him come in and back me up be he was already in bed. I don't know that Leland has ever put that together so well before tonight. That when we get stern or louder we are more angry. And maybe he has, maybe tonight was the first time he dared to say so! :)

Random

I need to play catch up with things I want to remember, so while this may not interest most of you it will be a good record for me :)

Leland started swim lessons on Monday this last week, he calls his swim suit his "soup" and his fave part of the lesson is getting the grwings aka Rings that he gets to dive for.

He often tells me he wants to "Squeeze my butts" which translates into squeeze your guts, but it makes me dissolve into laughter every time.

He is obsessed with finding his Dad during the day and often asks me "where is my dad?" and then he tells anyone who will listen the rest of the day that his "daddy is at work" which makes me smile.

He has finally grasped that there is a baby in my tummy and yesterday his baby kicked his head while he was resting on my tummy playing a game on "his Ipad".... I guess I shouldn't have been worried about his dad stealing it after all, it seems I should have been worried about Leland :)

Leland has discovered he loves all Sowa "Soda" and often asks for it and will sometimes even eat something he doesn't want just to get a small glass of it, I have used this trick to get him to eat lunches and dinners, we still haven't branched out from Cereal and Mac and Cheese but we have moved on from Ritz.

He loves loves loves his gold fish, and I love that he does... i often find them stashed in different places around the house and while its slightly annoying I still think its cute.

He LOVES his old Sunday School teacher in our ward and runs to hug her when he sees her, his new teachers seem amazed by him, apparently on Sunday he told them he went swimming with dolphins.... which he didn't. But maybe he had a lovely dream about it ;)

While we were away in Hawaii, Leland stayed with his Mimi and Poppy Hamilton, they set up a tent for him with an air mattress and he was in HEAVEN! He loved it, he called it his cave. They also taught him to tell people where his dad and I were. When asked Leland would respond "Daddy's at the beach, Mommy's at the beach" every once in a while he would tag on "sharks are at the beach and turtles are at the beach but Zebras are at the Zoo". I am pretty sure they also taught him to say the Sun was still awake when we try to put him to bed before 8 p.m. He has also learned in their pool how to use a fun noodle like a kayak paddle when on a raft and can navigate the pool quite well.

On the third to last day of school they sent home a free admissions pass for the Dallas Zoo, Leland finding it in his folder brought it to me and said "look Mom the Zoo! lets go!" I explained that the Zoo closes at 5 p.m. and the animals were getting ready for bed by 7 p.m. he seemed very distraught and wanted to go anyways demanding "Lets just go now!" I think someone misses our many trips to the zoo that he used to have before he was put in school. I may brave the heat and take him for a morning sometime next week we shall see though, I want us both to live longer than next week!

I don't know if its the pregnancy hormones but the amount of love and overwhelming feelings that I am so glad Leland is mine ( I have always been glad, but I needed him to be asleep to feel them so strong ;)) Now I feel them most of the day. This child amazes me, he is growing and learning. He is already as tall as my belly button, and he fits in his almost 7 year old cousins clothes just fine. He is sassy and spunky and just an all around good kid. He loves quickly and if you find favor with him you can do no wrong. He loves his Aunties, both his real ones and his none real ones and often when entering Amy's home yells "Cousins I am HOME!!!!" And when his Hope (I have asked him about this, she is not mine she is his) comes over he says "Yay! Hopie is home!" I am glad he has so many wonderful people that love him and support Brian and I in the raising of him, the free babysitting and the loving on my little guy makes my heart all the more fond of those around him.

Things that make me smile

We took Leland to the ultra sound to see what we were having... figured it would be a fun experience for him since he is certain we are lying about where this said baby is coming from :) Both Brian and I were talking up the appointment, telling him how excited we were for him to see his baby brother or sister, and what a good brother he would be. When we pulled in he instantly asked... "I go with you?" which he asks most every time we stop the car, as if we have ever left him all alone in the car before... He makes me laugh. He ran up to the office door and tried with all his might to open the heavy door, finally allowing Brian to assist and when he ran into the waiting room yelled out " HEY BABY" the front desk ladies cracked up... Brian and I knew he was excited to finally find "his" baby not necessarily calling them baby... but we let them enjoy the compliment. As we were getting all ready for the ultra sound they had me pull up my shirt and push my pants low on my hips to clear the way and Leland became very concerned that my tummy was hurting... he kept asking "Mom... is dour tummy hurt" I kept telling him it was where the baby was... finally he got up and came over to rub my tummy, and when I asked if he was saying hi to his baby he asked again where he was. I replied in my tummy... Leland looked at me for a minute, then walked up by my head and said "open dour mouf" when I did and he couldn't see anything but normal mouth stuff he matter of factly said... "I check dour feet" and walked down and started wiggling them. Needless to say by the time the doctor came in Leland was no longer interested in what was going on and more and was happily eating his cookies in the chair. But Brian and I are happy to announce we are having another boy. I am waiting for the excitement to build :) I am just happy they reported that he looked great and healthy and he was right on target for the week we are at with no markers for down syndrome (whatever those are I am not sure, but the doctor seemed pleased). Anyhow I leave you with this little gem that Brian captured to send to me while I was out and about the other day. Made me really smile :)

My oh My!

Today totally overwhelmed. I have no idea why, my lists of the days events don't sound major at all compared to some of the days Leland and I have had. But my oh my, today delivered! I sat down to dinner late, like 7:45 late, and I all I had had for lunch was a bowl of fruit loops. I sat down next to my child who was still up 45 minutes past his bed time and refusing to sleep, and thought over the angry " I'm just done" comment I spewed to Brian over the phone out of frustration that I 1. just wished he was coming home, and 2 was just overly tired and hungry. After all he was just checking on my day before he went to hang out with his friends. And as I sat there I just started bawling. Leland instantly came over to see what was going on and he asked "why you cry mom... don't cry" and patted my leg. I couldn't get a grip on it. I just sat and cried and cried and while I cried Leland kept inquiring as to what happened or if I was ok... he had climbed up into my lap and put his arms around my neck and told me to stop crying, he's ok. and that made me smile.... And I thought we are ok. Its ok for me to cry a little now and then with no real reason, we will still be ok... and with that he asked me to lay by him in my bed, on dads side... Thats his favorite place to sleep after all... On dad's side... We are all good... Leland is fast asleep on his dad's side and I am just unwinding from a long day... and planning to go lay next to my sweetest little in a bit...

Odd....

So I have this odd feeling like this new baby, while I am totally excited to be having it... is encroaching on my time with my current baby. Doesn't that just sound awful. I guess I will just have to make time for 1 on 1 time with me and my big boy when the new baby comes... that won't be hard because Brian is a baby hog... until they need their diapers changed... ;)

Just a little something....

That melts my heart and makes me smile every time I see it!

My boy loves to read...

I know I said I wouldn't play catch up....

But these are first day of school pictures for Leland.

He was so excited his first day, couldn't believe he was lucky enough to ride a bus! We got him all ready then waited patiently for the bus to come. We kept look out in our front room. Once he saw that bus he was gone! So excited he ran the whole way there.

Ms. Chris and Ms. Georgie are his bus driver/ helper. We adore them. They are patient with him, since the novelty of the bus has worn off some days are really challenging to get him on the bus if we can get him on it at all.

And his seat on the bus even comes with a seat belt. He was pretty stoked to be on a bus!

Since then things are going well he has speech a couple times a week. He is making great progress. Talking a lot more and in sentences instead of just demands. I couldn't be prouder of my smart kiddo. Love him to bits!