Random

I need to play catch up with things I want to remember, so while this may not interest most of you it will be a good record for me :)

Leland started swim lessons on Monday this last week, he calls his swim suit his "soup" and his fave part of the lesson is getting the grwings aka Rings that he gets to dive for.

He often tells me he wants to "Squeeze my butts" which translates into squeeze your guts, but it makes me dissolve into laughter every time.

He is obsessed with finding his Dad during the day and often asks me "where is my dad?" and then he tells anyone who will listen the rest of the day that his "daddy is at work" which makes me smile.

He has finally grasped that there is a baby in my tummy and yesterday his baby kicked his head while he was resting on my tummy playing a game on "his Ipad".... I guess I shouldn't have been worried about his dad stealing it after all, it seems I should have been worried about Leland :)

Leland has discovered he loves all Sowa "Soda" and often asks for it and will sometimes even eat something he doesn't want just to get a small glass of it, I have used this trick to get him to eat lunches and dinners, we still haven't branched out from Cereal and Mac and Cheese but we have moved on from Ritz.

He loves loves loves his gold fish, and I love that he does... i often find them stashed in different places around the house and while its slightly annoying I still think its cute.

He LOVES his old Sunday School teacher in our ward and runs to hug her when he sees her, his new teachers seem amazed by him, apparently on Sunday he told them he went swimming with dolphins.... which he didn't. But maybe he had a lovely dream about it ;)

While we were away in Hawaii, Leland stayed with his Mimi and Poppy Hamilton, they set up a tent for him with an air mattress and he was in HEAVEN! He loved it, he called it his cave. They also taught him to tell people where his dad and I were. When asked Leland would respond "Daddy's at the beach, Mommy's at the beach" every once in a while he would tag on "sharks are at the beach and turtles are at the beach but Zebras are at the Zoo". I am pretty sure they also taught him to say the Sun was still awake when we try to put him to bed before 8 p.m. He has also learned in their pool how to use a fun noodle like a kayak paddle when on a raft and can navigate the pool quite well.

On the third to last day of school they sent home a free admissions pass for the Dallas Zoo, Leland finding it in his folder brought it to me and said "look Mom the Zoo! lets go!" I explained that the Zoo closes at 5 p.m. and the animals were getting ready for bed by 7 p.m. he seemed very distraught and wanted to go anyways demanding "Lets just go now!" I think someone misses our many trips to the zoo that he used to have before he was put in school. I may brave the heat and take him for a morning sometime next week we shall see though, I want us both to live longer than next week!

I don't know if its the pregnancy hormones but the amount of love and overwhelming feelings that I am so glad Leland is mine ( I have always been glad, but I needed him to be asleep to feel them so strong ;)) Now I feel them most of the day. This child amazes me, he is growing and learning. He is already as tall as my belly button, and he fits in his almost 7 year old cousins clothes just fine. He is sassy and spunky and just an all around good kid. He loves quickly and if you find favor with him you can do no wrong. He loves his Aunties, both his real ones and his none real ones and often when entering Amy's home yells "Cousins I am HOME!!!!" And when his Hope (I have asked him about this, she is not mine she is his) comes over he says "Yay! Hopie is home!" I am glad he has so many wonderful people that love him and support Brian and I in the raising of him, the free babysitting and the loving on my little guy makes my heart all the more fond of those around him.

Things that make me smile

We took Leland to the ultra sound to see what we were having... figured it would be a fun experience for him since he is certain we are lying about where this said baby is coming from :) Both Brian and I were talking up the appointment, telling him how excited we were for him to see his baby brother or sister, and what a good brother he would be. When we pulled in he instantly asked... "I go with you?" which he asks most every time we stop the car, as if we have ever left him all alone in the car before... He makes me laugh. He ran up to the office door and tried with all his might to open the heavy door, finally allowing Brian to assist and when he ran into the waiting room yelled out " HEY BABY" the front desk ladies cracked up... Brian and I knew he was excited to finally find "his" baby not necessarily calling them baby... but we let them enjoy the compliment. As we were getting all ready for the ultra sound they had me pull up my shirt and push my pants low on my hips to clear the way and Leland became very concerned that my tummy was hurting... he kept asking "Mom... is dour tummy hurt" I kept telling him it was where the baby was... finally he got up and came over to rub my tummy, and when I asked if he was saying hi to his baby he asked again where he was. I replied in my tummy... Leland looked at me for a minute, then walked up by my head and said "open dour mouf" when I did and he couldn't see anything but normal mouth stuff he matter of factly said... "I check dour feet" and walked down and started wiggling them. Needless to say by the time the doctor came in Leland was no longer interested in what was going on and more and was happily eating his cookies in the chair. But Brian and I are happy to announce we are having another boy. I am waiting for the excitement to build :) I am just happy they reported that he looked great and healthy and he was right on target for the week we are at with no markers for down syndrome (whatever those are I am not sure, but the doctor seemed pleased). Anyhow I leave you with this little gem that Brian captured to send to me while I was out and about the other day. Made me really smile :)

My oh My!

Today totally overwhelmed. I have no idea why, my lists of the days events don't sound major at all compared to some of the days Leland and I have had. But my oh my, today delivered! I sat down to dinner late, like 7:45 late, and I all I had had for lunch was a bowl of fruit loops. I sat down next to my child who was still up 45 minutes past his bed time and refusing to sleep, and thought over the angry " I'm just done" comment I spewed to Brian over the phone out of frustration that I 1. just wished he was coming home, and 2 was just overly tired and hungry. After all he was just checking on my day before he went to hang out with his friends. And as I sat there I just started bawling. Leland instantly came over to see what was going on and he asked "why you cry mom... don't cry" and patted my leg. I couldn't get a grip on it. I just sat and cried and cried and while I cried Leland kept inquiring as to what happened or if I was ok... he had climbed up into my lap and put his arms around my neck and told me to stop crying, he's ok. and that made me smile.... And I thought we are ok. Its ok for me to cry a little now and then with no real reason, we will still be ok... and with that he asked me to lay by him in my bed, on dads side... Thats his favorite place to sleep after all... On dad's side... We are all good... Leland is fast asleep on his dad's side and I am just unwinding from a long day... and planning to go lay next to my sweetest little in a bit...

Odd....

So I have this odd feeling like this new baby, while I am totally excited to be having it... is encroaching on my time with my current baby. Doesn't that just sound awful. I guess I will just have to make time for 1 on 1 time with me and my big boy when the new baby comes... that won't be hard because Brian is a baby hog... until they need their diapers changed... ;)

Just a little something....

That melts my heart and makes me smile every time I see it!

My boy loves to read...

I know I said I wouldn't play catch up....

But these are first day of school pictures for Leland.

He was so excited his first day, couldn't believe he was lucky enough to ride a bus! We got him all ready then waited patiently for the bus to come. We kept look out in our front room. Once he saw that bus he was gone! So excited he ran the whole way there.

Ms. Chris and Ms. Georgie are his bus driver/ helper. We adore them. They are patient with him, since the novelty of the bus has worn off some days are really challenging to get him on the bus if we can get him on it at all.

And his seat on the bus even comes with a seat belt. He was pretty stoked to be on a bus!

Since then things are going well he has speech a couple times a week. He is making great progress. Talking a lot more and in sentences instead of just demands. I couldn't be prouder of my smart kiddo. Love him to bits!

HI

Its been a long time since I have posted regularly and I think I just feel too guilty about not posting enough or catching up... SO I am not going to catch up... just start over. :) I have too much to worry about without worrying about the blog.

Today was an interesting day. It went from being 85 to 45 and overcast. I don't mind... heavens knows I don't want the summer to start too early... that would be miserable. But it totally corresponded with my mood. I currently dislike going to church... NO I am not going inactive, I just hate going without Brian and because of his school schedule he is currently working Sundays. Thankfully he graduates in May, but it makes going to church a lot more challenging. My son makes it extremely difficult to be patient, I love him to bits... but he has all of my spunk and independence bottled up inside of him (today as we were late because I was making carrot cake, which I don't even like mind you) but today as we were walking in late to sit with Ame's family as I opened the door (thankfully they were still singing) Leland said totally loud "I'm Here Guys!" and took off to go sit by Ame... which was fine... and everyone who heard him had a good laugh... as I just shook my head and smiled. But then I felt like the whole time I was sitting there I was being judged, he was squirmy and couldn't sit through the prayers for sacrament and got really excited about his water... which he totally said loudly as well. I know its all in my head but its still there. Church is hard for me. I feel totally alone in the ward unless I am with Ame, I know this is not true. That people have tried to reach out but because of our schedule being so different we just can't connect, or not having a car or whatnot. It gets old feeling alone on Sunday's and its hard. And yes I realize thats my fault but still.

I spent two hours this morning making carrot cake... I don't even like carrot cake. But apparently I make a good carrot cake (thanks mom for the recipe) its all from scratch and takes a while and a lot of dishes especially when you are having to grate your own carrots.... And then the plans we had for the cake got cancelled and I was really looking forward to them. I am sure something important came up but still I was ticked that I had made this cake because of special request and now Brian would eat like one row and be done with it.... Not to mention this then meant I had to make dinner. But whatever... trying to be positive.

Then we had some Elders stop by. I am not sure why they keep stopping by but they do... and always on Sunday when they know Brian is at work. Sometimes I wonder if they are trying to catch him at home? Its odd really, they come and stand on my porch and we visit for a while,... they courtesy laugh a lot... and then I tell them nope there really is nothing they can do for me and they go. Its always pleasant but I always feel like they wonder how sane I am when they go. Oh and I ranted about the carrot cake to them... ended it with thats probably just the irrational pregnancy hormones talking, to which one of them said... No it sounds perfectly rational... It made me laugh.

Oh which brings up another concern... I am 20 pounds heavier than I was with Leland... what if I don't show... I realize to all you skinny mini's out there this doesn't matter.... but I would really like to show... I also realize that I am only 13 weeks so it will be a while... but still.

Anywho life goes on... I am trying to change my attitude, its not working.... SO I think I will go dye my hair or sit in a tub... something, anything to try and change how horribly depressed I feel.....

Note I totally didn't proof this before pushing post... but ya'll will survive right?